Which is odd, given that now I finally have a nice camera. And even a flickr account.
A camera which takes pictures like this. . . and (when I remember to use the "night landscape" setting). . . like this, too.
My step-mom MaryAnna and my Aunt Greta are in Korea now, travelling about after finishing an English camp. They're both teachers in Canada, and spent five weeks in Naju, and now they're up in Seoul for a bit to see me and hang out downtown and make Girlfriendoseyo happy.
My Aunt Greta is the younger sister of my deceased mother, and Mary-Anna is my Dad's new wife. . . and the fact those two get along so darn well speaks volumes, about how open and loving my mom's family is, looking out for Poposeyo, and even welcoming his new wife into the fold, and also about how cool my step-mom is.
On Sunday, we walked around Jongno and Insadong, and Chunggyecheon with Girlfriendoseyo, and had a capitol time.
There was a big olympics thingy going on at the top of the Chunggyecheon.
I believe the sport of the day was table tennis, on the big screen.
We saw "Jump," the comedy martial arts show running in Jongno. It was fun as anything, and you know how these comedy shows always pull some hapless schmuck up on stage. . .
well on Sunday, I was Schmuckoseyo.
MaryAnna snuck a few (contraband) pictures while I was up there, and Girlfriendoseyo laughed until she cried.
They made me do a somersault and some other silliness. . . but I don't want to give away their surprises or jokes, so I won't go into too much detail about what happened. . . but it was fun, all my old comedy improv experience from university rushed up to mind. . . as soon as I sat back down in my chair. But yeah. If I went there again, and they called me up on stage again, I would have gotten a few pretty good laughs, eh?
After Jump, we walked around a bit,
and then caught a cab down to this restaurant south of the river where they serve roast duck, and dear readers, this place is just ridiculously good. They stuff the duck with all kinds of healthy beans and berries, and roast it for three hours or so in a brick oven and stuff, and when it comes out, it's tender as anything, and yummy as . . . uh. . . something really yummy.
here's the full spread:
And a bit closer up:
And here are Aunt Greta (left) and Mary-Anna (right) doing Korean poses for the camera. They were both real gamers, ready to go and have adventures in Seoul, and all over. They toured Busan and Seoul all by themselves during this trip, and had great old times. Not too shabby, I say!
After that, stuffed to the gills, we headed up and strolled around Hyehwa for a bit, because it's a pretty neighbourhood, but we were getting tired (stuffing up on duck will do that).
There's a park in Hyehwa that's one of my favourite sites to sit and people-watch; street performers turn up there a lot, and all of Hyehwa is a bit artsy and fun, loaded with Theatres big and small. The park here was great until the wind shifted and carried garbagey smells to our schnozzes. . . but I played around with my camera's night scene setting and got these pictures, which I like.
And one of the ladies, lady-ing.
There were off-and-on spatters of rain from time to time, and every spot where a rain droplet (barely larger than mist) spackled onto my black umbrella, the street-light shone through the droplet and through the the black umbrella, making the inside of the umbrella look like one of those Star-Trek night skies. The picture here doesn't do it justice, but it was a little moment of beauty in keeping with the quote on my blog header, and bud, ya gotta pay attention to those, and write them down, or shoot them, or point them out to somebody -- not that you need to; you can stuff it in your pocket and keep it to yourself like a love-note from God just to you. . . but those gratuitously lovely morsels of universe taste better when shared (even clumsily, like this barely-even-manages-to-hint-at-it picture.)
The pictures catch about as much of the full day as a freeze-frame of a diver. . . but brothers and sisters, it was a lovely day indeed, and I thought I'd share it with you.
Memo to 7-11: If you manage to get one of Korea's loveliest faces signed for a photo shoot. . .
Hire a makeup artist and a photo-shop guy, too.
And she comes to the set looking like she didn't sleep, or has a hang-over
Send her home to sleep, and reschedule.
They say she's probably had reams of surgery. . . and it's not that I'm suddenly approving of the whole male gaze/beauty image thing
. . . but if they dropped a lot of coin to get a silly-hot star to appear (and in case you doubt she is. . . here)
You'd think they'd have protected their investment a bit with an airbrush.
(they could have called the soju people and asked for tips:)
And these aren't even "X-star at home/taking out the trash in sweatpants" pics, in which I wouldn't criticize a star for being human -- these are for an ad campaign, so I'd have thought 7-11 would try to make their star look nicer -- I was just startled to see pics of a normally ridiculously pretty star looking so un-gorgeous. (Gorgeless?)
It took me five seconds to recognize the familiar-looking fifty-year-old as actually being the 20 (or so) year old 김 아중.
(or is that just how quickly plastic surgery faces age?)
In other "normally very very good-looking stars looking hung over, tired, or raggedy in an ad" news. . . from a while back. . . "Sorry I'm late for the photo shoot. I was getting, ah, acquainted with your product last night until four."
remind you of anything?
oh yeah. also. something something olympics. something something bla bla blah, China something something lip synch something something TOTALLY UNSURPRISED.
As much as I stand by what I've said before about the Olympic organizers, the IOC, and the way China is using this olympics for their own nationalist propaganda. . . ya still gotta cheer for the athletes.
To know what TV is like in Korea right now, watch this clip. . . forty times in a row.
(P.S. Korea's going gold-medal bonkers right now. . . but it won't last, according to girlfriendoseyo, who tells me all Korea's strongest events are in the first few days of the Olympics -- Judo, archery, shooting)
Last night I was talking to one of my best friends, someone I've come to trust deeply over years of being in the kind of conversation that is woven into our whole lives. . . .We were talking about self-perceptions, and how they compare to how others perceive us. I often perceive myself to be....all these negative things, but according to my friend, this is not how my friends perceive me. . . . I'm writing about how almost all of us do this very thing all the time, and how just sad it is, maybe more than anything.
If we knew that we were loved, it would change everything, wouldn't it? What if for one day you were granted some kind of supernatural power so that you could feel just how much people loved you? (I feel like I know what so many of us would fear--we wouldn't want to be granted that supernatural power because we'd be so afraid that people are secretly annoyed and disgusted by us. And this is precisely the point.) But people do love temporally and imperfectly. But if we knew that we were loved, absolutely and eternally, that we are always always inside endless love....well, yep, that would change everything.
Why, tell me why, is this so damn hard to really get a hold on? Why are we bumbling around in these illusions, so convinced that we're on the cusp of being cut off, when in fact we're fairly swimming in love? Jesus. In those brief moments when I know that I am loved, through and through and through, then I am completely free. And in those moments it becomes suddenly clear to me just how not-free I am most of the time. How I am missing the joys of my life, missing the glorious cosmic dance. Not because I'm not a part of it, but because I'm deaf to just how much of a part of it I am. I can't hear that the music is everywhere.
And even in this, in my deafness and illusions, I am loved. Oh, but how I wish that I could know it, live it, all the time. Know what I mean, dear readers? Know what I mean?
Third: James Turnbull of The Grand Narrative (one of my favourite Korea blogs) dropped a few pearls on the expat topic. . . not a full, Grand Narrative Special (those get pretty involved), but worth a look. Meanwhile, if you have connections with awesome non-teaching jobs in Seoul, or any kind of awesome jobs in Busan, keep your ear to the ground for our blog-buddy James: he's on the market.
This pic: when you hand out a student needs survey, and a student just NEEDS to let you know "Hey. Teacher. I'm cute as heck, and you better know it."
Rising food prices are hitting the little guy now. I bet every item on this menu is 500won more than before.
At coldstone creamery in Piano Street, they have mastered "Suggestive Selling" . . . I don't know what that is, but I'd like to see some. I'm not quite clear on how one CAN sell ice cream suggestively. Lollipops, sure. Skin cream, heck yeah. Ice cream . . . need to see it to believe it.
Two weekends ago, the candlegirl made an appearance at Jogyesa. I wonder how many bows she made to keep mad cow disease out of Korea.
My favourite anti-government graffiti: (just down from piano street) that's all for today, folks.
Well. . . I just got a new university job, so I'll have to content myself with having a great job instead. Miles better than my old one. 'till the weekend, then. . .
here are some pictures I'm pretty sure are from the new movie. I won't know for sure until I've seen it, though.
Hi there. If you're a Korea Herald reader who decided to check out my page after reading the "Expat Living" article, 'You don't understand Korean culture', welcome!
The series of essays The Korean and I wrote about complaining expats and defensive Koreans are here, and they've started a very interesting conversation online, which I've tried to document with links and summaries:
If this topic really interests you, also take some time to read Gord Sellar's views on the topic: "Who's Complaining In Korea" Part 1 Part 2 Part 3
and if you have something you want to say about it, go ahead and put it online, and send me the address where I can find it. Or e-mail your thoughts to me at roboseyo [at] gmail [dot] com or write them in the comment board to this page.
(soundtrack: I Never Wanted To Be A Star, by Cat Stevens - snicker)
Highlights from the article:
(the first part of the article describes how Brian Deutsch was basically hung out to dry by his school, and the magazine he wrote for, when somebody tried to cyber-bully him for being too critical of Korea.)
Still, there a few prominent expatriate blogs in Korea that receive a lot of hits. The six we are interested in here are: The Marmot's Hole, Scribblings of the Metropolitician, The Grand Narrative, Ask a Korean!, Roboseyo and Deutsch's - Brian in Jeollanam-do.
The Marmot's Hole is run by Robert Koehler. . . .
"Our role is to offer commentary and criticism from a fresh, outside perspective," Koehler said. . . . "All countries are open for criticism. The question that really needs to be asked is whether anyone should take what we write seriously. For the most part, the answer to that would be no.
"Besides, generalizations are kind of fun - nationalistically hysterical Koreans, pot-smoking over-sexed English teachers, condescending expats - who doesn't love 'em. It's all a question of how seriously you take what you read."
Scribblings of the Metropolitician comes from Michael Hurt. The blog is a mishmash of social criticism, international politics, pop culture and comments on Korean media.
Both Koehler and Hurt brought up Alexis de Tocqueville, a Frenchman who wrote "Democracy in America" in the first half of the 19th century. Both men consider this book a great commentary on the United States.
"The fact that we're foreigners shouldn't disqualify us. I look at American social commentary and social criticism and some of our sharpest and best social critics have been foreigners, people coming from a foreign perspective," Hurt said.
"Why would I put all this effort, why would I even care, or put myself out there, why would I do this if I didn't actually give a (expletive)?"
New Zealander James Turnbull runs The Grand Narrative.
"I find the notion that only Koreans are 'permitted' to speak about Korean problems simply absurd," he said. "That isn't to say that all foreigners' opinions on them are equally valid, but if the roles were reversed then I'd be quite happy to hear the opinions of, say, a Korean person who had spent some time in New Zealand and who made an active effort to study and know New Zealand society and learn the language. In fact, probably more so than someone who was merely born there.
"The majority of netizens aside, I've actually found a significant number of Koreans to feel much the same way about the opinions of non-Koreans.
"Koreans are not unique in readily dismissing the opinions of foreigners, but they do seem more defensive about foreign criticism than most. For that reason, it is very important to use Korean sources as much as possible.
"Without any Korean ability, foreigners are usually forced to rely on either the limited English language media or books for the bulk of their information, and both have problems: the former for often presenting a rose-tinted version of Korea to the world, and the latter for being quickly out of date in a country as rapidly changing as Korea."
"[Criticize] in Korean, and in a major Korean newspaper," Koehler said.
Writing complaints in English may be "cathartic," he said, but it does no good.
Why do foreigners complain so much?
(and, like the guy who was an extra in a movie hauling all his friends to the cinema, and shouting, "Here it comes!" when the Cafe scene begins. . . here comes my quote!)
Another pair of bloggers, a Korean man living in America (Ask a Korean!) and a Canadian teacher in Seoul (Roboseyo) put together a two-part series dealing with foreigners' criticism and social commentary.
Ask a Korean! wrote, "many complaints from expats that the Korean has seen show a certain level of ignorance. This is not to say that complaining expats are dumb. It is only to say that were they more aware of certain things about themselves and about Korea, they would not be complaining as much, and the pitch of their complaints would not be as strident.
"Expats rarely venture out of large cities in Korea, and they only really interact with Koreans who are fluent in English. Do you know what makes a Korean fluent in English? Money, tons and tons of it. So not only are expats insulated from older Koreans, they are also insulated from younger Koreans who are poorer. What kind of understanding about Korea could an expat possibly have with this kind of limited exposure?"
About social critics, Roboseyo wrote, "Naming a problem is the first step to solving it, and maybe some of these critics are attempting to be a legitimate part of that process - that is, they're writing because they want to see Korea become a better place - in which case, Koreans who are upset about non-Koreans criticizing Korea need to stop and take a careful look at why that upsets them, because the problem does not lie in the complainers or their intentions.
"To be fair, sometimes the social critics' intentions are good, but their methods are poor: the sometimes bitter and mean tone of certain critics can be hurtful, and as I've said to some of my friends who complain about Korea with a rude or condescending tone: 'when you talk so harshly, even when you're right, you're wrong, and even if you win the argument, you still lose.'"
[Brian Deutsch, despite the cyber-attack will continue blogging about Korea.]
"I've also had to question how welcome those opinions are. My colleagues themselves told me that it was not my place to opine on what are called 'sensitive issues,' and a recent letter to the editor in the Gwangju News suggested that I, and foreigners, mind their own business and not worry about Korean internal affairs.
"But I think foreigners do have a right to speak about problems in Korea and to address sensitive issues from our own perspectives. At the most basic level we are invested in this society, even if for only a short time, and we pay taxes, function as consumers, participate in local communities, and teach local children.
"Moreover these issues are so prickly because they're not black and white. While it might be unpleasant for some Koreans to hear the other side of the story, I don't think it's inappropriate for it to be raised.
"Our opinions are often dismissed with a line about 'you don't understand Korean culture.' Often this comes when something unpleasant happens to a foreigner, or when a foreigner expresses an opinion disagreeable to the Korean listener. It's well beyond my abilities to explain why this happens, but it's patronizing and inappropriate. I do believe that although foreigners can sometimes dwell on the negative when writing or talking about Korea, I think taking a critical look shows an interest in the host culture that can be healthy if applied properly.
"I realize that a greater measure of tact is necessary when addressing sensitive issues and when trying to foster conversations across cultural boundaries, but even with a lot of coddling I remain cynical that people are ready to hear what we have to say just yet.
"I would love to have Koreans who disagree with me take the time to point out their objections, rather than simply railing against a foreigner who dares to publish something against the grain. And I would love to have Koreans spend more time trying to educate us about their culture and their views, then, since so much energy is spent telling us how wrong and misinformed our opinions are."
Deutsch said he was asked by his school to drop the case against Kim, and that his job was also placed in jeopardy because of what he has written.
And that last line is exactly why I think we need to talk about this, instead of letting things stay as they are.
Good news: this topic has more legs than even I thought it would, and I'm really happy that it's reaching more readers, and filling up more heads with thoughts. Meanwhile, being listed in company like that is quite a thing on the K-blogosphere. Kind of like being invited to K-Blogapalooza.
As always, if you want to tell me what you think about this topic, post it on your blog, and send me the link in the comments, or at roboseyo [at] gmail [dot] com and I'll print, or summarize, or link it here.
Have a great day, readers!
[full disclosure update]
I just got an e-mail from the editor of the magazine Brian wrote for, offering a few more details than I included in my summary of the Herald piece, when I hastily said, "the first part of the article describes how Brian Deutsch was basically hung out to dry by his school, and the magazine he wrote for"
a few quotes (with permission from the editor)
"The magazine has actually been very supportive of Brian. (personal details about the editor's involvement in the situation. . . ) The problem [Brian had with the magazine] is individuals not the organization.
The majority of the people who "work" for the magazine like Brian and myself are volunteers. This has it's pros and cons. In the July issue http://altair.chonnam.ac.kr/~gshin/gic/July%202008.pdf (pdf file) there was a letter to the editor. This writer was unhappy with two articles that were printed, one of them being Brian's most recent. Though myself and the acting editor had hesitations about what the author was saying in response to these articles, the letter was printed largely due to the fact that the man is a board member at the GIC and the non-profit magazine relies on their support. In the same issue though another article was printed, inspired by what had happened to Brian, explaining how though one might not agree with what had been previously written, it served a purpose and he had the right to do so.
Though I wasn't completely comfortable with the tone of the above mentioned "letter to the editor" the comments about the other author mentioned in it (not Brian) encouraged others who were not regular writers to submit pieces to the magazine. One is the letter to the editor in the August issue http://altair.chonnam.ac.kr/~gshin/gic/August%202008.pdf. The other will be an article in the upcoming September issue.
Though what happened has created its fair share of stress and in some instances fear, there has been some good from it. People are talking. To be fair, some writers are feeling more hesitant to put "pen to paper" but others who were hesitant before are feeling inspired to have their voice heard.
And I owe my dad an apology for all the grief we kids used to give him over the jokes he used to tell us. Sorry pops. Love ya.
The phrasing is awkward, but the oldest recorded joke is (drumroll please):
"Something which has never occurred since time immemorial; a young woman did not fart in her husband's lap" (something which I remember seeing one of my dear friends do to her husband --followed by her shoveling handfuls of stinky fart-air towards his face, much to the amusement of everyone in the room but her husband). There are a few others -- nothing about baked beans and surprise parties, traveling salesmen and wanton farmers' daughters, Moses, Elijah, and Mohammed at a golf course, or rabbis, priests and imams finding dead camels, though. Indeed, it seems most of the world's oldest jokes are dirty -- my favorite is the oldest Anglo-saxon joke: "What hangs at a man's waist, and likes to poke the hole it's poked many times before?"
Dirty jokes are a proud oral and even written tradition (hee hee. Oral). Even Geoffrey Chaucer, the father of English Literature, took the time to put in a filthy scatological yarn in his Canterbury Tales (yay The Miller!)
and frankly, even though the language was as dense and bewildering as a jungle, I STILL laughed out loud at ""Tehee!" quod she, and clapte the wyndow to,"
For more on funny jokes (no guarantee that they're sophomoric, though). . . according to the laughlab project, THIS is the world's funniest joke. (click on the link to read the runners-up, too.)
Two hunters were standing in the forest. One of the hunters suddenly collapses. The other takes out his cell phone and dials 911. The operator answers, "Hello, what is your emergency?" The hunter replies, "I was hunting with my friend and I think he's dead! What should I do?" The operator then tells him, "Make sure that he is dead." The man says, "Just a second." There is silence on the phone and suddenly a loud gunshot is heard. The man then asks the operator, "Okay, now what?"
and my over-under on the number of my readers who tell that joke sometime in the next 24 hours: 20%.
And the least funny:
"The most frequently submitted joke, at 300 times, was: "What's brown and sticky? A stick."
Researchers said no one ever found it funny. "
Final joke observation:
I used to like reading the jokes in each month's "Reader's Digest" and then either call out, or laugh in my sleeve at, all the people that month who used those jokes on their unwitting, non-digest-reading friends. Everybody knows you have to go into the BACK ISSUES to find material that people can hear without remembering the punchline.
Update: discovered this response to the article, too. Don't forget: if you want me to link you, it's better to let me know where to find you! The Baekgom's Lair made me really happy, because of this quote:
"want to talk about an article which I read the other day, that really tipped me over the edge in terms of wanting to create a blog. This was a joint piece between The Korean of Ask a Korean! fame, and Roboseyo from his self-titled blog."
and then went on to make some good points. Wow! Thanks for the feedback Baekgom; that's really encouraging. Another great paragraph:
There are other things that get to me too, like sometimes just the tone of the criticism is enough for me to rebel against what is being said, even if I agree with it in principle. But I'm fairly happy for what I've already said to represent my feelings on the issue. Bottom line: the coolest ex-pats I meet here are the ones who take things as they see it, and don't let their good or bad experiences with the place taint their perspective on things. If they have mostly positive or negative things to say about the place, that's generally due more to their personality than anything. The others may as well stay out of my way, because I always do my utmost to stay out of theirs.
[Update] Baekgom has also, just now, posted a response to the question, "Why do Koreans take Criticism of Korea Poorly?" by going in a totally different direction, and asking his middle-school students, "Is Korea the best country in the world?" The results are very interesting, and I like the conclusion a lot.
Again, Foreign/er Joy has posted a response to my second question: "Why Do Koreans Handle Criticism Poorly?" that's worth reading.
Jennifer talks about "good Korea days" and "bad Korea days" -- something I TOTALLY understand (I also have good Korean days and bad Korean days, depending on the people I bump into that day.) She also breaks down the types of comments on the comment board of one particular post, in order to show that not ALL commentary about Korea is unfair, unjustified, and harsh criticism.
As a response to Roboseyo: For someone who has lived in Korea for such a long time, it seems that the a fundamental basis of Korean Society has been missed. . . . "Saving Face" is perhaps the most important concept to understand when discussing Korean sociological issues and it seems to be missing or way too lightly considered in Roboseyo's post. . . . I don't think "outsiders" (myself included) can understand how serious Koreans take this and live by this concept. . . .I would have to say, to Koreans, criticizing their country is way more than dirty laundry when you are openly criticizing Korea. To put it into our severity, it would be like throwing feces on the American flag. It is impolite to openly criticize (whether constructive or destructive) openly in public.
If Korea has been able to do what it has in the last 50 years, (BTW. Korea is a top 10 major player in the world economy now), then why does it need to adjust? Why is it that western cultures think Progressive means westernizing? Think if the roles were reversed (which honestly I could see happening in the next 100 years, if you factor that China, Japan, and Korea are all "major" players in the world markets and still growing and soon to be added to that list India) how do you think you would react if other countries were telling the US and other western countries that they are "behind the times" and that Progression means "Easternizing" or conforming to the Asian cultures? It definitely would not be received well.
Just because you have stayed in a country for as long as you have, something to remember is your still a visitor. I was wondering, how do you give "constructive criticism" to a society/nation? Are your comments really going to change something and be useful/productive? if not, they are not constructive. . . . remember while, in Korea (no matter how long), you are still a visitor and certain boundaries shouldnt be crossed. Apparently you have found where that boundary is and my advice would be to stay clear from it. Korean society isnt like American society, its less forgiving of people who like to "stir things ups".
Here are some questions Roboseyo has asked of Koreans: If criticism of Korea by non-Koreans upsets or offends you, why does it? Yes. Because does anyone like being criticized? In the US people are used to open criticism, in Asian societies they are not. And to think that Korea has to "develop" and get used to this is frankly unacceptable in my opinion.
How could those views be expressed without upsetting you? Under what conditions ARE outsiders allowed to criticize Korea? Frankly to be honest, I really don't want to hear what people dont like about Korea. Same with the US, I don't want to hear what people dont like about the US. There are no conditions in which I would openly be grateful to hear criticisms about either country from foreigners. However, What I find that works is you can discuss the differences between the visiting country and what your used too. But just because your used too it doesnt mean its better.
Here are my last responses to the last set of questions Roboseyo poses:
Whence all the negativity on the K-blogosphere, from both sides? Personally I try to stay out of it. Its not something I want to publicize because I think it detracts from the many great things Korea has to offer. Why focus on the negatives of various cultures. Its not like the Korean society is killing anyone or committing genocide. So why the "urgency" to degrade the society?
Why do YOU think expats complain about Korea? Because expats complain about whatever country they live in anywhere in the world. . . . Expats tend to be ungrateful and compare everything that is happening to them to what they are used to and to their native country. . . . And frankly I agree with the philosophy that if you want to complain so much, then leave. . . .No one is forcing expats to stay in Korea. . . .
Why do you think critiques are often taken so poorly? Does anyone take critiques gracefully? Again, you have to understand "Saving face" better to truely understand the how much this means to Koreans in this scenario which you are exploring.
Is it just that the internet makes everything seem more extreme than it really is? Is there something I simply missed? I think people post stuff on the internet a little bit too freely because they are behind a computer and not face to face. It would be real easy for me to critique you or anyone out there because of the internet barrier. I could post things that I would never say person to person..
Sorry for the long post, but I hope this helps Roboseyo.
Ksoje has also posted some interesting things at Ask A Korean!
A1) 95% of the reason, it is human nature. Geez, isn't it obvious? It happens everywhere. My wife complains a lot about her parents and other relatives, but if I say something slightly critical about them I know she will be upset. . . . The other 5% can be accounted to the closer association Koreans have with their race and country. Any criticism to their country is a criticism to the people, to the race and ultimately, to themselves.
Q2) If Koreans are so sensitive about it, how would a non-Korean go about criticizing Korea without offending anybody? A2) Like I complain here in USA, very carefully. Understand you are talking about a country and culture to which you don't belong. Try to throw in a couple of compliments in between complaints. For instance: "The USA are the least racist country in the world but I'd love if the media here didn't stereotype Asian men as martial artists or geeks". See? It's easy, I started with a compliment and then followed it with some criticism.
I just moved into a new apartment, in order to start a new job at Privacy University, where I'll teach adults (as before) work harder, and have VACATION TIME!!! I'm also next door to my best friend, so things aren't too shabby. The new apartment is just about triple the size of my last place, but my stuff is still all over the place. Anyway, I'm a happy dude.
Random thought of the day:
Now, swimming is one of the best things you can do for your health, so it follows that high-level swimming competitors are probably extremely healthy.
I'm not into guys or anything, (though the people who collected these photos seem to be). . . but Michael Phelps, even if you care nothing for swimming and sports, is an Impressive Human Being: he's a contender for eight (count'em, eight) gold medals at the Beijing Olympics (which I still don't support, but I'm not getting into that here). He won six in the Athens Olympics (and two bronze), and has set his sights on Mark Spitz's single-Olympics record of seven.
Meanwhile, the guy looks like God called up a swimming coach and asked for tips on creating the perfect swimmer. Look at those long gorilla arms and crazy huge hands for scooping through the water. I mean, he also works hard and he's a hell of a competitor. . . but he sure got the physical tools to go with his mental makeup.
Here's the "for the ladies" part: a little beefcake to balance out all those bikini pics and TNA that I usually post here.
(turn on safesearch before you do a google images search for him, though -- there are certain demographics who, um, like insane sixpacks, and whose sites some of my PG-13 or Focus On The Family readers may not want to accidentally visit -- the things I put myself through for you, dear readers! The things I put myself through.)
However, if you like pictures like this (you're welcome, Melissa), give him a google.
Suddenly, MTV cares about swimming. Hope swimming inc. isn't disappointed when they lose interest after Sixpack, I mean Phelps, retires.
To be fair and balanced, female swimmers are also very very healthy: Amanda Beard, who spent a little while near the top of men's magazines' "Sexiest Female Athlete" lists, battling it out with Maria Sharapova and Anna Kournikova and a few other people without NIKE contracts, looks very healthy, too. Amanda once posed for playboy, thus making it hard to find clean pics to post here - turn safesearch on before you do the image search for her, if you're at work or something. Luckily, I painstakingly combed through all those dirty pics to find a few excellent, clean pics to help you appraise the condition of her health. The things I do for you, dear readers. The things I do. (More images of Amanda Beard here.)
We discussed the perception that Expats complain too much about Korea here and here. The other side of the dynamic is Korean defensiveness. The Korean has written about it on my page (next), and on his page, here. This is my stab at the question.
Soundtrack time: hit play and start reading.
Everything about You, by Ugly Kid Joe.
So, the next question, and it's a biggie, is: When Expats, or other International voices, or basically, Non-Koreans DO criticize Korea,
The other thing to remember is that people are extra-sensitive to what ``foreigners" say.
The Korean view of nationalism is race-based. In other words, the thing that you are taught in Korean schools and homes that distinguishes you, as a Korean, from other nations, is your race. Although the world is politically structured around the concept of the nation, few countries distinguish themselves by race. Korea is one and that means that when a bald white face such as mine leers at you from the pages of this newspaper, it is immediately recognized as foreign. Yes, it is a vision of beauty, you find yourself thinking, but no, it is not Korean. That means that, even though I've lived and paid taxes here longer than most Koreans, I am immediately perceived as an outsider commenting from my hotel room. Thus, any criticism is taken to be the rudeness of the visitor.
And even when that is the case, it is never meant. OK? Group hug?
Now, Breen's lived in Korea a long, long, long time, but as soon as he criticizes Korea, he is demoted to "an outsider commenting from my hotel room." Conversely, I've discovered, if I tell people how much I like Korean barbeque, and how much I enjoy Kim Kwang Seok, and name-check Korea's top five pop-stars, I'm told I'm practically Korean -- a blue-eyed Korean, if you will. I'm welcomed into the club. . . as long as I only have nice things to say. This kind of double-think reminds me of a movie I watched when I was a kid, where every time a father saw his son do something well, he'd say, "That's my boy. Look what my son did!" but whenever he stepped out of line or did something disappointing, the dear old man would point at his wife and say, "Look what your boy just did!"
Without the defensiveness, the expat complaining would be a non-topic -- the dynamic is what makes this interesting at all. I'm still not convinced that expats in Korea complain more than expats anywhere else, but there's a perception going around that they do, and that put-upon attitude is reflected in many, many comments all around the blogs about Korea (poke around yourself: won't take long to find them). As far as mentioning beefs and complaints in person, to Korean friends and students, I've had the full range of responses, from interested attention, to a surly, "if you don't like it, you should go home".
Myself, I don't mind a reasoned defense, I don't mind a discussion or a debate, but I DO mind being accused of hating something when I'm only trying to discuss it, and I DO mind attempting to learn somebody's views on something, only to have my questions or suggestions met with an emotional backlash, or a slogan, and I really mind the attitude, not that my complaints are incorrect, or formed upon false assumptions (which the debater is capable of pointing out to me), but that my non-Koreanness means I shouldn't be saying what I'm saying, like the Korean who suggested his netizen buddies try to "correct" Brian in Jeollanamdo's critical attitude.
So assuming I've expressed my complaint reasonably and fairly. . . whence the defensiveness, as if some people think we expats are not allowed to criticize?
Now I have to defer to The Korean on this topic, and acknowledge first that, not being a Korean myself, I'm sure there are nuances or points I'll get wrong, or miss completely, even as The Korean warned me in an early e-mail "you know, I'm only one Korean -- I can't REALLY speak for everyone -- just remember that, K?" (paraphrased) However, when I run into the attitude that I'm not allowed to complain, because of things about me which I can't change (for example, my race, age, birthplace, or mother tongue), there are a few things that I think to myself, to calm myself down. They're generalizations, but you know, looking for patterns is something we humans naturally do -- Grok, who notices patterns in animal tracks, is a more successful hunter, and has a better chance of surviving to reproduce than Throg, who just kind of goes into the forest and does whatever with a sharp stick in his hand, and hopes he lucks into some food for his wife (whose behaviour he is completely incapable of reading--which doesn't help him propagate, either, especially since she invented a couch for him to sleep on). I don't think making generalizations is wrong in and of itself-- if generalizations are used to try and understand otherwise mystifying phenomena, they can be useful. If they're inflexible agents of judgement, that's when they get hurtful instead of helpful.
Apologies and butt-coverings aside, let's acknowledge, first of all, that anybody gets defensive when you slag something they love. Let's be fair. If I talk smack about my buddy's wife, I'm gonna get what's coming.
So explanation number 1: It's just human nature, dummy.
And, as with my buddy and his wife, if I have some critique that's well-thought-out and carefully phrased, and especially if my buddy knows I have a long history of being respectful and kind to his wife, and I know her well, he'll listen to my critique a little better-- generally, the Koreans I've met respond much more positively to constructive criticism than to straight-out ranting (which expats really shouldn't lay at their feet, anyway).
Explanation 2: As with the whining expats, it's the internet, remember? The complainers, the K-defenders and the uber-sensitive Kimcheerleaders are all noisier, and more surly online than anywhere else. If a hundred Koreans read my article, and ninety-eight agree, but two disagree enough to leave poisonous remarks in my comment section, I still come away feeling like Koreans can't take criticism, even though almost everyone actually argreed with my points. . . quietly. Surly k-defenders are much more likely to take the time to drop a little "just go home, jerk! Korea treats you well and you're an ungrateful turd" into the punchbowl. If Joe Expat is getting tired of them, I strongly recommend that he go hang out with some real Korean people (the other 98%), rather than taking his lumps from Korean netijens (who, like netizens of every nationality, often hide behind anonymity to act like jerks, because they can.)
(Soundtrack, part 2: hit play, and read. Patience - by Micah P. Hinson: warning: one bad word.)
Next soundtrack song will be happy.
Explanation 3: Some expats are too critical, never offering Korea a shred of grace for the fact it's come a bloody long way, and managed (mostly successfully) to cram 200 years of development into 50 years. (This comment is a really good, emphatic look at that, as is Gord's Part Three on "Who's Complaining in Korea," here.) Korea's still a work in progress, and while I don't think it's fair to ask every expat commenter to praise unreservedly, nor to maintain some magic ratio of praise to critique, or add a disclaimer at the beginning of each post, it kind of behooves some of them to offer the benefit of the doubt from time to time. Because of Korea's 5000 year history, and because Kimchi cures SARS? Not really, no. Because 50 years ago Korea was poorer than Haiti? Heck yeah.
The pundits, bloggers, commentators, and general blowhards who are too ungenerous damage their own credibility, I think, and frankly, in the same way that I don't revisit many restaurants that serve me bitter food, an expat's blogging or conversation style will turn me off, and deter me from visiting their site or answering their calls, because I don't like doing things that bum me out, and that includes reading things and hanging out with people, that are graceless, tactless, ungenerous, compassionless, and just plain rude and condescending.
As I said before, if they're blogging to get it off their chest, I'm glad they did, in the same way I'm glad you feel better after barfing up that rotten egg-salad sandwich you ate for lunch, but in both cases, I'm not going to stick around and watch, thanks. If people are blogging or talking to draw attention to things, and contribute to the discussion, they ought to consider their tone and audience . . . all-bashing is just as one-sided a discussion as all-kimcheerleading, just as likely to venture into the realm of self-parodic hyperbole, and just as likely (and worthy) to be ignored.
From here on in, let's be very clear here that the rest of these are theories and guesses and generalizations; don't take this as the final word on the topic by any means. This next theory is kind of cumulative -- a lot of influences piling on top of each other, to provide a kind of context for the K-defending.
Explanation 4: The Explanation Pu-Pu Platter or, in Korean: 모듬 명분 (HT to Google Translate)
4.1. In forty years, Korea went from a country that needed aid, to a country that could offer aid. Countries that NEED aid are approached with a very different mentality -- look at how far backwards international aid organizations are bending/bent, to convince Myanmar and Sudan's leaders to allow relief workers into their countries. Look at the lengths to which countries are going to accommodate Kim Jong-il's ludicrous demands. When people need help, the international community approaches its leaders on its leader’s terms, in order to facilitate the helping of civilians. "We should understand their culture" or being "culturally sensitive" makes sense in that kind of situation.
However, when a country is trying to attract international investment or gain influence in geopolitics, the onus is no longer on the international community to suit THEIR needs; now, the onus is on a country to adhere to international standards. (Or, like China, to bend the rules by offering cheap labour and suppressing their currency's value, so that even though China doesn't meet international standards for working conditions etc., it remains extremely profitable to outsource there.)
Here in Korea, we're only a generation and a half removed from kids running behind US Army jeeps shouting for American GI's to throw them some chocolate. Some of my students remember days when silk-worm larvae was the closest thing they could afford to meat, and the oldest son was the only one in the family who got to drink pricey milk. Korea has gone from being helped to meet international standards, to being judged according to international standards in a very short time, so this whole "member of the international community" is still pretty new territory for Korean society as a whole, and they're still figuring out how to take their lumps.
4.2. Add to that the pride in having risen in the international community so quickly (as well as the heady feeling of all the good press Korea had during the early 1990s: "Here Comes The Asian Tiger!" -- “why can't the international media write stories like THAT about us anymore?”)
4.3. Add also a feeling of historical grievance from the perceived and actual humiliations Korea suffered during the Japanese Colonization, a period of much controversy to historians, and the still raw humiliation of having needed such extensive aid during the 1950s and 1960s -- that image of Korean kids running behind US Military vehicles shouting "Gimme chocolate" is an embarrassment to many of the older Koreans who used to do it.
4.4. Add to that, the fact many Koreans identify with their ethnic and national roots in a very strong, emotional, even visceral way -- many Koreans don't say "Korean" when talking about their language, they use a possessive -- and not just a possessive, but a PLURAL possessive -- say these three sentences out loud, to see the difference this makes: "Does the DVD have Korean subtitles?" "Does the DVD have subtitles in MY language?" "Does the DVD have subtitles in OUR language?"
Pretty striking difference, eh? That's what "Urimal" means: "Our language."
Now try these three sentences: "Why is he criticizing Korea?" "Why is he criticizing MY country?" "Why is he criticizing OUR country?"
Koreans often say "Our country" (Urinara) to refer to Korea. Again, striking difference.
Whether the use of "our language" and "our country" is a cause or an effect of this deep personal identification with country is moot to this discussion; however, the use of language provides a pretty clear illustration of how personally many Koreans connect their self-identity with their nation, and that helps to explain why criticism often meets such visceral reactions.
With that sense of ownership in mind, that familial pride, think again about how these Koreans think of criticism from outside:
Imagine a guest coming to your new house (the building of which almost killed you), running his finger along the mantle to check for dust, checking the brand labels on the china in your cabinet (hmm. Made in Pennsylvania? Not even from England?), noting loudly that your living room sofas are not Corinthian leather, unlike his sofas back home, and commenting under his breath, as you introduce your children, "Your daughter's a bit chubby, and your son has bad posture, and your other son speaks slowly . . . are you sure he's OK in the head?". . . it'd start to rankle, wouldn't it? Especially if he's constantly talking about all the virtues of his house and his family (and admit, in a moment of honestly, that we've all occasionally given the situation back home more credit than it quite deserves, especially in areas like social welfare and education, where Korea has shortcomings, and knows it). Right or wrong, like it or not, this seems to be how it feels to many Koreans when outsiders criticize.
Soundtrack 3: hit play and keep reading. If You Want to Sing Out, Sing Out, by Cat Stevens.
4.5. On top of that, is the fact that the almost entirely homogenous society in Korea, along with the Korean language media, gives Korea the illusion that Korea can still operate like it did in the 1800s -- as an island shrouded in mystery (Korea didn't earn its 'Hermit Kingdom' moniker for nothing). Sometimes, reading a critical blog to Koreans is, as my commenter put it, "Like having my family's dirty laundry aired out" Part of the reaction to a critical K-blog is simply embarrassment that domestic issues are being presented in English (the international language) for anyone to read: "can't we keep our in-house issues in-house?"
This is a mistaken assumption, that it would benefit Koreans, and especially the Korean media, to realize: Korea no longer exists behind a shroud. The language barrier is getting porous, as more Koreans can read English, and now, more and more internationals can read Korean. When a Korean makes comments that play to the home crowd, those comments get translated into other languages now, where in 1970, probably they didn't, or nobody cared anyway, and Korea's leaders and media could pretty much say what they wanted, without much risk of being called to account, as long as they spoke in Korean.
Now, if a Korean factory owner rips off his Indonesian employees, thanks to the internet and the ease of world travel, Indonesians hear about it, where twenty years ago, they wouldn't have, and one ripped off factory worker returning to Indonesia broke, one English teacher cheated out of his severance pay, back in New Jersey complaining, one Vietnamese imported bride murdered by her Korean husband, damages Korea's international reputation more than half a million dollars of "Korea: Sparkling" newspaper and TV ads in Indonesia, Vietnam, and Jersey, can repair. Meanwhile, the ripped-off Indonesian’s uncle blogs about the dirty crooked jerk Korean factory owner, and again, a Korean READS that blog post, where in 1985 it would have been a hot topic around the Indonesian village, and no Korean would have known that Korea was being bad-mouthed somewhere in the world. Communication is better worldwide, Korea’s behaviour at home is reported worldwide, and Korea’s reputation is affected. The sooner Korea realizes this, the better it will be for everyone. As international communication increases, countries will increasingly get exactly the international reputation they deserve, whether they think they deserve it or not.
[rabbit trail: the Korean media will resist acknowledging this truth for as long as they can, because they will then have to come to grips with the fact that as more Koreans' English improves, they will need to improve their product to compete with Reuters, CNN and BBC, instead of just with each other, or they will lose their formerly captive audience.]
4.6 Add to this the fact Korea IS a major world player now (top fifteen economy and all), so Korea is attracting a lot more attention than back when it was mostly farmers and war amputees and beggars. This is good for Korea, but it's difficult taking criticisms, when within living memory (and that can’t be emphasized enough) Korea used to take humanitarian aid (which goes down much easier) instead.
Unfortunately, that's part of being at the top of the pile (a major playa): I'm sure Austria would have loved for that news story about the kidnapping/confining/rapist father to disappear into their own language media, and if that had happened in Burkina, maybe nobody would have heard about it, but instead it was covered on every network. Canada gets embarrassed by a serial killer who kept going for five years longer than he should have, because he was killing Vancouver prostitutes, and mostly First Nations ones at that, and nobody important cared enough about First Nations prostitutes -- the most disaffected, marginalized subsection of probably the most disaffected, marginalized group in all of Western Canada!. . . there's no hiding from that shame anymore, and everybody gets their turn in the spotlight, both for good (KJ Choi wins Sony Invitational) and for bad (PD Diary faces criticism by CNN for crap journalism).
Soundtrack 4: saved the happiest one for last. Be Joyful, by Rock Plaza Central
My question, then, for Koreans, is this, and this is a genuine question that I'd love to hear answered, by as many voices as possible:
While other posters and commenters have made the point that Koreans complain about Korea better than anyone else. . .
If criticism of Korea by non-Koreans upsets or offends you, why does it? How could those views be expressed without upsetting you? Under what conditions ARE outsiders allowed to criticize Korea? (And is it just a tiny minority who feels that way, but they happen to leave a disproportionate number of comments?)
If you have an answer to that question, I'd sincerely love to hear from you. Write in to roboseyo[at]gmail[dot]com and tell me: why do YOU think Koreans take criticism of Korea so poorly? Is that a completely mistaken impression to begin with? When, under what conditions, WOULD criticisms of Korea be taken with an open mind, and judged according to the content, rather than the speaker? If your answer is interesting, I'll publish it on my blog. Throw it down in my comments section if you like, or publish it on your own blog, and send me the link.
I think this question is getting harder, because there are people with Korean blood living around the world, who can't speak the language and barely know anything about Korean culture, while at the same time, there are people from other countries who live in Korea now, who have invested a lot in Korea, in money, time, energy, and passion. Can we dismiss the opinion of a fluent Korean-speaking Ph.D. in East Asian studies, because he has no Korean blood? What about the Indonesian wife of a Korean farmer who's lived here for ten years? Is her opinion more valid if she's mothered children with her Korean husband? What about a Kyopo who has Korean blood but can't speak Korean? What about one who can't speak the language, but reads every book, and follows every news and opinion source he can? What about a pure-blooded transnational adoptee from Korea, who grew up in Denmark, and knows nothing about Korea except that she was born there?
I've given my thoughts; fill me in if I missed something!
Expat Bloggers as well: this question is for you, too. Whence all the negativity on the K-blogosphere, from both sides? Why do YOU think expats complain about Korea? Why do you think critiques are often taken so poorly? Is it just that the internet makes everything seem more extreme than it really is? Is there something I simply missed? Send me your thoughts, or post on your own blog, and send me the link. Let's have a discussion.
There was a big olympics thingy going on at the top of the Chunggyecheon.
I believe the sport of the day was table tennis, on the big screen.
And a bit closer up:
There were off-and-on spatters of rain from time to time, and every spot where a rain droplet (barely larger than mist) spackled onto my black umbrella, the street-light shone through the droplet and through the the black umbrella, making the inside of the umbrella look like one of those Star-Trek night skies. The picture here doesn't do it justice, but it was a little moment of beauty in keeping with the quote on my blog header, and bud, ya gotta pay attention to those, and write them down, or shoot them, or point them out to somebody -- not that you need to; you can stuff it in your pocket and keep it to yourself like a love-note from God just to you. . . but those gratuitously lovely morsels of universe taste better when shared (even clumsily, like this barely-even-manages-to-hint-at-it picture.)
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The pundits, bloggers, commentators, and general blowhards who are too ungenerous damage their own credibility, I think, and frankly, in the same way that I don't revisit many restaurants that serve me bitter food, an expat's blogging or conversation style will turn me off, and deter me from visiting their site or answering their calls, because I don't like doing things that bum me out, and that includes reading things and hanging out with people, that are graceless, tactless, ungenerous, compassionless, and just plain rude and condescending.
(Or, like China, to bend the rules by offering cheap labour and suppressing their currency's value, so that even though China doesn't meet international standards for working conditions etc., it remains extremely profitable to outsource there.)
This is a mistaken assumption, that it would benefit Koreans, and especially the Korean media, to realize: Korea no longer exists behind a shroud. The language barrier is getting porous, as more Koreans can read English, and now, more and more internationals can read Korean. When a Korean makes comments that play to the home crowd, those comments get translated into other languages now, where in 1970, probably they didn't, or nobody cared anyway, and Korea's leaders and media could pretty much say what they wanted, without much risk of being called to account, as long as they spoke in Korean.
What about one who can't speak the language, but reads every book, and follows every news and opinion source he can? What about a pure-blooded transnational adoptee from Korea, who grew up in Denmark, and knows nothing about Korea except that she was born there?
