Sunday, August 30, 2009

Canada Trip Pictures: Driving Around Western Canada

So I went to Canada and stuff, but never posted the pictures I'd promised.

Now, a good bunch of them are on my primary computer, which is currently suffering an IP address error which I must wait until monday to resolve, but I uploaded all these a while ago, so you can see them.

And what else did you do this weekend, Roboseyo?

I was sick, so I mostly just stayed home and bummed around. Watched some sweet Alfred Hitchcock Movies: Cracked Rear Window, The Birds, and Psycho were all pretty awesome. Hostel was terrible. If I'm going to see so many movies, I might get my hands on the AFI top 100 or somesuch. Or watch more Korean movies, seeing as I owe alls'y'all a rundown of Korean movies well worth your time to see.

But here are some pictures of my trip to Canada.

Vancouver, downtown.
The night sky on the way home from white rock.
Many of the side streets in vancouver were vitually car free; maybe I missed something, but it seemed like they were reserved, either legally or tacitly, for bicyclers.
Near Grand Forks, British Columbia. The Rocky Mountains were in especially fine form this trip, and a good thing, as I drove across them twice, stretched over three days: one day from Langley to Red Deer, my sister's hometown to my brother's, eight from Red Deer to Creston, where my other sister lives, and eight more from Creston back to Langley again: a triangle punctuated by stops to stretch my legs, drive throughs, an epic seven hour stretch without finding a single Tim Hortons, lots of coffee, fewer pee breaks than usual, because of careful liquid intake (I'm a bit of a road-trip badass, after so many times needing to skooch all over the place so often).


I tried taking pictures of some nice stuff without stopping the car, by pointing the camera out the window, but it didn't really work out as often as I'd hoped it would.


I stopped at this bridge right before the sun went down: it was right in my windshield, making it dangerous to negotiate corners and stuff, so I just got out of the car and took pictures until the sun was low enough not to bother me anymore. This shaft of sunlight caught tons of bugs... few enough of them mosquitoes, that it didn't bother me much at all.
I also saw eagles circling above the river.
Other pictures of random vistas around the rockies.

Mist rolled in around Hope... not long after I took this picture, I couldn't see a hundred yards ahead of the car.
This looks like a KIA ad.
Harrison Hot Springs is a little resort town near my old hometown. Harrison Lake is an awesome freshwater lake. The resort town means my hometown is pretty as anything, but the cheesy tourists all go to harrison, which is close enough to enjoy, but not so close that I have to hear cheesy new-age music every time I walk to the pharmacy in my old hometown.
That there's Mount Cheam. My old house had a view of that mountain (from a different angle) right out my bedroom window.
Highway 7 between Mission and Harrison Mills is another of the prettiest patches of driving I've ever seen.
My sister lives in Creston, one of the prettiest corners of the world I've seen. The town also enjoys some of the most delicious tapwater in the world... certified. BC's interior is known for that. You wouldn't know it, but that fresh water blew me away, of all things, the entire time I was in Camaba.

I chased a sunset one day in the rental car. Glad I did.



We went down to a riverside park my sister knew. It was great. My sister and her husband and kids played by the water while I took sundown pictures. I also had a really great few conversations with my sister about... all the important stuff.


My niece, and her town.


In Alberta, Highway 22, the Cowboy Trail, is another of the greatest bits of driving I've ever done. In fact, if I'd had time to hit up Vancouver Island as well, it would've been ALL the nicest drives I've done in my life. But we can't have it all.




And I had a good berry crumble at Wendel's in Fort Langley.
Took some pictures of Banff on my way through.


Cutest picture: I was glad to know Red Deer is a Nuclear Weapons Free Zone. That is, until Kim Jong-il drops one on it.
Few more of Red Deer, where my bro lives.

And mushrooms in the garden outside my brother's house.
Pictures of Niagara Falls, Southern Ontario, and who knows what else, coming ... soon? Whenever.
In conclusion, Korea is a land of contrasts. Thank you for reading my essay.


Wednesday, August 26, 2009

An Excuse to Post Abracadabra, by Brown Eyed Girls, or...

Music videos of Korean girl-groups involving more than seven females trying to be sexy... just don't do it anymore. Especially when the choreography amounts to, "I'm hung over and lazy, so let's be overtly sexual enough to get the video banned, and get publicity that way, rather than going to the effort of making an actually good video." AND they borrow a few English phrases and mangle them to sound cooler. If we were playing crappy Korean music video bingo, they'd have checked half the boxes already.

Anyway, here's Abracadabra by Brown Eyed Girls. There IS a reason I'm posting it.


I'm posting it because THIS is awesome: a few Korean BOY-Band members made a spoof of this video, set in a Jimjilbang, on the "I'm so dirty, I need to take a shower" theme. And it's actually funny. Funnier if you read the lyrics, and funnier still if you've gritted your teeth through the original video, to see what they're referencing.

ht popseoul



(ps: if you DO want to play "Korean music video bingo", here's what to put in the boxes: I'm trying to get one that'll fit for a dance OR a ballad video)
  • voicebox/vocoder
  • a sexy dance-move that isn't even TRYING to be a dance move anymore
  • a room surrounded by huge TV/projector screens
  • a clear attempt to get the video banned by the censors, for more publicity
  • a band with more than six members
  • an actual or implied lesbian/gay kiss
  • a male acting like a female
  • a male dressing/looking like a female
  • gangsters beating somebody up
  • a wheelchair
  • echoing tires screeching
  • upskirt shot
  • a break in the song to act out a scene
  • somebody bringing flowers to a hospital room
  • close-up of cleavage (female) whether she earns it or not
  • close-up of ass (male or female) whether s/he earns it or not
  • close-up of abs (male or female) whether s/he earns it or not
  • shouting in a police station, or with police nearby
  • shouting with echoes while being physically restrained in slow motion
  • a line of melody, rhythm, or vocal mix that eerily resembles something from Western pop
  • a girl playing coy with a boy despite wearing a skirt that only comes down to her uterus
  • a girl with hair dyed blond, orange, or pink
  • an ambulance
  • actual black people
  • a korean acting like a black person (bonus point if it's with facepaint)
  • band members groping eachother
  • one of the BFF dies
  • taillights disappearing in the distance
  • walking alone at night
  • shouting at the sky in the rain
  • sharing an umbrella
  • sad face with police/ambulance lights shining on it (rain optional)
  • putting flowers on a grave
  • smashing a cellphone
  • bird flying in slow motion
  • mangled English in the chorus
  • a girl rapping in a low voice
  • a girl rapping in a shrill voice
  • dance moves popular in the '90s
  • ebonics
Added from/inspired by comments:
  • slumber-party scenarios - teddy bears, pyjamas, pillow fights
  • simulated selca (self-camera) where people make cute faces at the camera as if it were a cellphone camera
  • asian poses (minimum ten to check this box: shouldn't be hard to clear)
  • people wearing headbands that look like cute animal ears, or comically large minnie-mouse hair bows
  • a girl who can't back it up, backing it up. (hint: it's not in the elbows or the forearms)
  • words at the bottom of the screen, or coming out of someone's mouth with a speech bubble
  • dressed like jailbait (high school uniform/baby clothes) making overt sexual gestures (oh wait, that's like a free square)


To be fair:
Ha Ha Song, by Jaurim, a Korean song I DO like.

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

On Ugly English Teachers and Racist Korean Journalists: Part 5: 'Seyo's Marching Orders

On Ugly English Teachers and Racist Korean Journalists: Let's not all crap our pants now: Part 5: 'Seyo's Marching Orders

(image)

This is the last of a 5-part series about racist reporting on English teachers in Korea, and how the English teaching community should respond. For the other parts of the series, see these links.

On Ugly English Teachers and Racist English Teachers: Let's not all Crap our Pants Now: Intro
Part 1: But You're TEACHERS!
An Open Letter to new English Teachers in Korea
Part 2: Why, Yes, Korea DOES have a Batshit Media! Why do you ask?
Part 3: Yeah, Some Self-Reflection Is Called For, but not From You, Ms. Choi
Part 4: Racism, Culture-shock, Acclimation and Integration in Minjokland
Part 5: The PR Campaign: 'Seyo's Marching Orders


So now that I've expounded till I'm blue in the face about being teachers, expat transgressions, Korean reactionism, the expat community, and the frustrating condition of living in a society that is still in the process of... SO many things, and the fact neither Rome, nor social change, are built in a day. But until the clouds part and everything's peachy, being a visible minority here, it's time to get our butts on a PR campaign: we've got to stabilize and consolidate our own community, at the same time as we work to improve our image in the Korean public consciousness.

And I'm here to give a few starting tips. Here are some things we can do, in order to be part of the solution instead of part of the problem.

First, we've got to start on the assumption that there is an expat community, and we are a part of it, even if we don't have a whole lot in common with that weird guy who works at the hagwon down the road, or that crusty old veteran whose Korean ability is the only thing that tops out his cynicism. Stick up for each other, help each other out where we can, and encourage the newcomers we work with to do likewise. Whatever our differences, and there are plenty, we need to have each other's backs on the big stuff, because, frankly, not many Koreans will throw another Korean under the bus for a foreigner's sake, unless that foreigner's her sister-in-law or something, so the least we can do, in the face of the Minjok and the knee-jerk elements, is to present a similarly united front. Yeah, we're all adults and stuff, but the old salts ought to take on at least a little responsibility for the greenhands, for their experience here, and for their behavior here, so that next time around, THOSE people are instilling that same sense of responsibility toward their peers, colleagues and successors, and to their successors in turn: if we can create a culture of accountability and responsibility toward the other expat teachers in Korea, we're most of the way toward a functioning community already.

We've got to reach out -- make sure that new teachers get invited out, to meet the crew, to give them a toehold into inclusion. We should get together with other expats in our areas, that we know who teaches at the school nearby. Choose, or spread word about the foreigner bar in the neighborhood (every neighborhood has one, or should,) but then don't let it stop there, with drinking buddies...(that's kind of the stereotype, isn't it?). Start clubs, take daytrips, climb mountains together, adopt a stretch of highway, volunteer at a local orphanage: be a presence in the community, not just at the bar. Small groups need to form connections -- we can't exactly get all 20 000 of us together for a party (or is that what the Boryeong Mud Festival's become?), but we CAN get the foreigners in our neighborhood meeting and knowing each others' names, so that we have couches to crash on when push comes to shove, and people to knock on the door of our ex-bosses' offices when the completion bonus isn't showing up as promised.

As part of that community we're trying to form, we need to act in a way that is responsible toward the other English teachers we work with and deal with closely, but also the English teachers who will come after us, and the English teacher population at large. A lot of this is detailed in my open letter to new English teachers. You know what, folks, don't even throw the other expats here under the bus in order to feel like one of the "good" foreigners. It's short-sighted and counterproductive, and pitting us against each other is an easy way to make sure the expat community never amounts to anything. Kushibo thought we should all take HIV tests to show OUR hands are clean, but I disagree: doing that automatically frames the discussion in terms of "good" foreigners and "bad" foreigners, in the same way that Chris Rock's famous "I hate n****rs" routine draws a line between good and bad blacks...and then reinforces EVERY negative stereotype about African Americans. Framing the discussion that way automatically assumes, indeed, lays suspicion, that there are enough "bad" foreigners to justify that test, which means that even if my result is clean, I'm part of an inherently "dirty" group, or at least, when people first meet me, they'd better watch closely, in case I AM one of the "bad" ones, rather than offering the benefit of the doubt. Yeah, Chris Rock has demonstrated that he's one of the "good" ones, but we don't walk away from that routine thinking, "Yeah, what a swell guy he is" -- we walk away thinking about the negative stereotypes he trotted out. It's the same thing when we draw the good vs. bad foreigner binary. Don't sit around going, "well, there are certainly a lot of no-good English teachers... good thing I'm not one of them," because it increases the "other" of all foreign English teachers but yourself, and that's fine for you, but counterproductive for the community. Don't totally deny that there ARE some bad ones -- that's just bull -- but always, consistently and emphatically assert that every population, and every group, has good and bad members, and the entire group shouldn't be judged by the behavior of the bad ones. And repeat that as often as necessary, and leave it at that. No need to bring up examples, either of good expats or bad Koreans, or bad expats and good Koreans. Every group has good and bad people, because every group is made of humans. (And don't always bring up Cho Seung-hui and Park Han-se during this conversation: shit'll get raw. The point of the assertion is NOT to throw the bad ones in peoples' faces... that's what they do to us, and we hate it, don't we?).

Another thing we've got to do is support and get involved in the expat and English teacher organizations that are already out there. ATEK, AFEK, KOTESOL, all the regional and interest-based facebook groups and meetup.com clubs. Join up, sign up, show up... it's worth it. And if you don't like one of the groups, start your own, or get involved with another. As I said before: if we have a dozen groups that can help people form communities with like-minded people, we're miles better off than if we ask one or two to pull all the weight, and then if all those groups can join in on the big issues, we're looking way better.

And don't just join the groups, and only call when the hogwan boss is ripping you off. As Satchel Paige, the old baseball player said, "Don't pray when it rains if you don't pray when the sun shines." -- community isn't the same as a safety net. It means something we contribute to, in order to belong more, and take more ownership, of the place where we are in life. If you didn't send a bit of cash when Matt Robinson or Bill Kapoun or Nerine Viljoen were in the hospital, if you don't want to think about Stephannie White's situation because it makes you kinda uncomfortable, well, why should the community stick its neck out for you when the shoe's on the other foot? Community is ... MUST be a two way street.

Earlier I speculated on how great it would be if there weren't just one, but many organizations working, not in competition with each other but on behalf of all the various groups of English teachers, to represent the different needs of different groups. Groups like that need to get together, and get in touch with the high-up mucky-mucks who currently have Lee Eun-eung as their go-to expert on Native English Teachers, and that's it.

You know what else those groups have to do? They have to open channels of communication, and collaboration, with the other migrant workers in Korea. While us poor little rich kids don't gain a ton of sympathy complaining for our own rights, we have a lot more in common with the Southeast Asian contract workers than we think, in terms of how our visas work, how our bosses can (legally) and do (actually) treat us, in terms of the laws made protecting our rights. Ditto for those of us who marry Koreans and the South-Asian brides who do the same. It's a mutually beneficial situation: if we, Canadianers, Aussies, Yanks and the like (countries Korea wants to impress) use that national-status clout to get Canadian ambassadors and such leaning on Korean lawmakers to help out the South-Asian DDD labourers, it increases the chance of stuff getting done for them, and honestly, they need more help than we do. Meanwhile, by aligning ourselves with a group of people who garner, and frankly deserve, a lot more sympathy than a bunch of university-educated HDI-enhanced professionals can muster, we will get onto the World Human Rights radar a lot more easily than if we're just a cluster of poor little rich kids crying cocktail-party-foul.



We need to take the connections we DO have with Koreans, and strengthen them. As I said before, this dialogue is happening on two levels: the big picture, where organizations and human rights lawyers and press arbitration commissions get involved, and on the micro-level, where I come to work on time and sober and ready to work every day, in order to create an image of professionalism in my community. Don't smoke in front of your school building, don't get puking-drunk in your neighborhood, where for all you know, the person serving you drinks has a kid at your school. Do demonstrate respect to the people and the culture around (back to that top ten list) -- be ambassadors, because that's what we are, in a country so unaccustomed to visible minorities and real diversity, and so prone to making blanket generalizations about those weird, different looking people.

(image: Boo!) Another thing: keep the high ground, no matter what. Minorities will never get ahead if they answer in kind. Returning hate for hate, spite for spite, rudeness for rudeness, will only confirm the negatives stereotypes people already have for us, and lead to escalating reprisals. Yeah, it's hard to step off when somebody just shouted a big fat "fuck you" or a "yankee go home" at your back, or called your girlfriend a whore or your boyfriend a traitor, but like Jackie Robinson blazing his trail in baseball, when Branch Rickey told him he had to NEVER RETALIATE for his first two seasons, no matter what people did, we've gotta have the high ground. We have little enough wiggle room already, being under the microscope: giving up the high ground means we have nowhere to stand.

image Another imperative is that we don't marginalize ourselves. Yeah, an expat community is important and helpful, and some of the long-termers who have "gone native" might do well to reconnect with the ordinary joe English teachers, if only because the advice they could give would be about a million times more useful than Johnny Six-months asking Janie Eight-months how Korean culture works, and what's expected, and why everbody in the neighborhood looked at him funny for five days after he went jogging through his neighborhood without a shirt, revealing the tattoo on his back. On the other hand, it's ALSO important that we don't self-marginalize. To continue the micro-level public relations campaigh, we can't forget to form and work on connections with Koreans. Join clubs, get involved in language exchanges, join a church or temple or volunteer organization or hiking club, have dinner at your students' parents' houses, so they can see you're a decent human being (and not just at the milf divorcee's place, eh?). Basically, if we can't participate in the media because of the language gap, at least we can participate in people's lives, which is more powerful anyway, for those individuals. And every social change starts with individuals.

I'm sure there are other tips I could give. Sure of it. Remind me of them in the comments! There are other tips, other angles, yeah, but basically, we've got to be aware of who we are, and where we fit in Korea's wildly changing society, and from there, we've got got got to be mindful of the implications of our position, and responsible for and towards our own, because we ARE your people, we ARE lumped in together, and as such, there are thing expected of us, and things we can do about it, so let's get on it, folks.

Let's go.



Brain Fart Update: I can't believe I forgot this one from Gomushin Girl in the comments:

START LEARNING THE LANGUAGE! I know it's hard, especially if you're working full time teaching English, surrounded by coworkers who speak English. I know that the language is radically different and thus takes time to learn. It doesn't matter. If you're going to be here for more than a few months you owe it to yourself and others to make all reasonable efforts to become able to communicate in Korean. You shouldn't expect to become fluent in a year, but for goodness sakes, gain some basic skills. And then KEEP BUILDING THEM! It gripes me to see people who learn enough to order a beer and say hi and thank you figure they know enough and just stop aquiring more skills. Enroll at a language hagwon, make a study group, something! It's the number one thing that will make your life in Korea more enjoyable, easy, and interesting.

Monday, August 24, 2009

New Contest: What The Double Hockey-Sticks is this guy saying?

What the h-e-double hockey sticks is this guy trying to say, other than, "I memorized 20000 TOEIC Vocabulary Words"? If you can explain the article satisfactorily in 40 words or less in the comments, you win a cookie.

I ain't no dummy: I studied Chaucer and John Milton in University, and I can wrangle my way through a technical manual or an academic article with the best of'em, even in fields I don't know too well, but holy cow, is the writing getting bad at The Times. "I don't understand any of this. It must be good. Greenlight it."


Convergence vs. Divergence

By Lee Sun-ho
from the Korea Times

Have you ever paralleled convergence and divergence in your day-to-day life? As a matter of fact, I wasn't quite interested in the concept of how and when a function converges and diverges until I became familiarized with using some electronic devices in this digital era of the 21st century.

Convergence is defined as the approach toward a definite value, as time goes on, or toward a fixed equilibrium state.

A trend toward conversion of digital media led to exciting competition over how many functions can be integrated into a single device.

A typical convergence product is an electronic dictionary for Korean-English, English-Korean and English-English.

The chief drawbacks of convergence products are that they are expensive and few consumers actually use all the functions together.

The operation without partition among banking, securities and insurance companies has been a good example of convergence in non-electronic fields.

Corporate recognition of convergence as a business tool will give the transportation and logistics professionals the status necessary for meaningful participation in the planning and decision-making processes.

In contrast, divergence represents the volume density of the outward influx of a vector field from an infinitesimal volume around a given region of space.

The competing goals of divergent groups must be channeled for a new social order in which constituents strive for harmony and diversity in best-in-class devices.

That's where divergence products, dedicated to fewer functions, which get rid of needless functions and focus on the core features, come in.

What matters more is the quality of the mobile phone function comes in less than a multi-function gadget. A mobile handset without a digital camera is a divergent example of a runaway success struggling to compete with cheaper and quicker online new sources for consumers these days.

Likewise, a tendency toward ``the-simpler-the-better" option is applied to the daily living for the convenience of the aging generation.

Highly value-added endeavors based on an integrated combination of the two methods are able to be realized for the benefit of tangible and intangible worldwide selectors through the appropriate choice of each individual.

If you feel that you never made a mistake in your life, then it means you never tried anything new. I've learned that not all branches are alike.

Some branches converge, some diverge, and purposeful merging is designed to support both. I happened to find an amusing allegory of bloggers on Jesus vs. Darwin. The comparison shows a traditional Christian convergence vs. an evolutionary Darwinian divergence in marketer blogging on social media.

An auction manager's recent report suggests that the sales ratio between convergence and divergence products is almost the same in Korea since the end of last year.

You can examine your paths and select what you think is an adequate mix of the two, entirely depending on your own personal taste or interest by generation, by genre, by hobby and by value system for the purpose of taking the role of a conductor (as in a music orchestra) to coordinate your inside workings as well as to communicate to your outside contacts, coping with emerging global norms and standards of this blogging world.

The writer is an outside director of Kunwha Pharmaceutical Co., Ltd. in Seoul. He can be reached at kexim2@unitel.co.kr.

random photos...

Random pictures from the back files.

Fredo Viola: The Sad Song


Hee hee. It makes sense for these two cds to be next to each other.Behind sejong art center. Just like this one.

This old guy was cool. He featured in my one-week-only Roboseyo masthead.
On Namsan, it was startling how many people were taking the same, dumb picture of Seoul Tower between their fingers. Maybe it was on a TV drama.
Seoul National Art Center, or whatever it's called (too lazy to check) south of the river, near Nambu Terminal.

I can cook this. You probably can't. Sucka!

Friday, August 21, 2009

Been a while since we had a bliss-out

Bright Tomorrow, by Buck Futtons.
I like the way it builds, not to a towering payoff, but still, on a steady incline.

and the video and the sound are a really remarkable match

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Jang Gi Ha is not my lover

nor is billie jean.

the Korean recommended I check out the singer Jang Gi Ha, and as i'm always looking for Korean artists whose defining trait is not their ability to move in sync with a group of bandmates who look the same as them, I'd been enjoying his youtube clips when I came across this one.

Sweet.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

On Ugly English Teachers and Racist Korean Journalists, Part 4: Racism, Culture-Shock, Acclimation and Integration in Minjokland

On Ugly English Teachers and Racist Korean Journalists: Let's not all crap our pants now: Part 4: Racism, Acclimation and Integration in Minjokland

This is part 4 in a 5-part series about racist reporting on English teachers in Korea, and how the English teaching community should respond. For the other parts of the series, see these links.

On Ugly English Teachers and Racist English Teachers: Let's not all Crap our Pants Now: Intro
Part 1: But You're TEACHERS!
An Open Letter to new English Teachers in Korea
Part 2: Why, Yes, Korea DOES have a Batshit Media! Why do you ask?
Part 3: Yeah, Some Self-Reflection Is Called For, but not From You, Ms. Choi
Part 4: Racism, Culture-shock, Acclimation and Integration in Minjokland
Part 5: The PR Campaign: 'Seyo's Marching Orders

So here we are in Minjokland: Korea is a country where, (particularly during the difficult climb from being a third-world, impoverished shithole [Image source] , to a legitimate global force,) people were very explicitly and intentionally inculcated, indoctrinated, and programmed, to take pride in Korea for surviving many foreign menaces in the past, and yet remaining racially pure during all that time. I'm not scholar enough to trace the history of the one-blood myth, much less deconstruct it, nor am I thorough enough to demonstrate whether Korea's historical "foreign menace repelled...TWO THOUSAND TIMES!" myth holds a lot, a little, or no water at all, and I'm certainly not going to assert conclusively that the largest proportion of the crappy things Koreans suffered throughout Korean history were actually inflicted upon them by other Koreans (say, the elites who had money and power, on the proletariat), and not foreigners at all. I'd venture a guess, but couldn't say for sure whether Koreans' exploitation of their own nearly matched, matched, outstripped, or far outstripped the bad business that was done to Koreans by people from other countries. That's outside the scope of this article anyway, because how Koreans view their history is more important than whether that view is accurate, when we're discussing a country's self-perception, and where we fit into that matrix.

So what we have is a country proud of its pure blood (that focus on blood isn't as strong as it used to be, but it used to remind me of, uh, well... and the pure bloodline is called "Minjok" - hence the title. More about minjok here.), and told of a long history of being invaded by Bad People Who Want To Wipe Out Korean Culture, and of Korea repelling those invasions. Now, since 1910, if North Korea counts as Korea, and since 1950 if North Korea now counts as a different country (which I think it does), nobody's invaded Korea. There's much less reason for the people to band together and lock elbows and fight for their nation's very identity... yet that myth of some kind of monolithic "Real Korean Culture (That Must Be Defended and is Constantly being Threatened)" lingers: it's hard to unlearn an entire childhood of rah rah propaganda from an all-powerful dictator.

Don't believe old habits die hard? Here's another place where you can see ingrained patterns perpetuate, even after they (probably? most likely? clearly?) are no longer necessary, is in the Korean National Assembly. You know why those old guys keep reverting to extreme, overblown, wildly demonstrative and melodramatic rhetoric and tactics? Because back in Park Chung-hee and Chun Doo-hwan's days, when they were in High School and University and learning how countries work, that WAS the only way to make your point. The ordinary channels were blocked, or corrupt, or mere tokens, so sit-ins, hunger-strikes and molotov cocktails were the way to get stuff done, and those were the methods that earned Korea an actual democracy, instead of a sham dictatorship.

So now, without a military aggressor/villain trying outright to outlaw the Korean Language from being spoken in legal proceedings, official functions, and educational institutes (as happened during the Japanese Colonial period), there's this wacky Western Culture, and rather than hammering iron spikes in rocks to screw up the geomantic power of Korea's important sites, it's causing young people to tan, dye their hair yellow, wear pink men's shirts and speak a weird dialect full of alien, new words, and it's seeded the whole country with huge, ugly-as-hell tombstone-apartment blocks, and western brand-name shops, and people aren't learning to respect their elders like they used to, and instead of being forbidden from speaking Korean, they're being forced to learn English, not on pain of corporal punishment anymore, but on pain of stunted career opportunities, and finally one morning they wake up and don't recognize the country where they were born. Can you imagine anything lonelier than finding yourself a stranger in the only land you know, anything colder than being called anachronistic and outdated in the place you grew up, at an age when you'd expected to be growing old with honor and respect?

So it's anybody's guess just how much of Korea's hate-on for English teachers is actually redirected anxiety over Korea's rapid modernization and the loss of some romanticized image of "the old ways".

The whole percieved cultural hegemony thing sure can rankle, and while, deep down, I think Koreans recognize that yeah, they DO need America's military protection, and America's economic partnership to hold their place in the world, and that Koreans ARE generally better off now than they were getting ripped off and held down by their yangban overlords in the Chosun days, and certainly better than when they were having their culture boot-stomped by Japanese colonizers, we English teachers are a nice vent for the resentment that springs from the feeling of inferiority born of NEEDING that help (or at least having needed it in the past). And us English teachers? We look different, and we're from the countries Korea can't OPENLY alienate, and we're right here next to them on the bus or at the next table in the restaurant. We're easy [photo source] backlash targets, conveniently located three doors down, so let's remember that at least SOME of the bile directed at us is of a passive-aggressive, "I'm punching the wall because I'm not allowed to punch my father-in-law" nature, and not really about us at all, in the same way that the beef protests weren't really about beef. The exact same way.

As we struggle to find our place in Korean society, and as our expectations of Korea bump up against Koreans' expectations of us, let's consider this, too: On both sides of the (especially older male) Korean/foreign (white & especially male) English teacher head-butting binary, many, probably most of us are spectacularly unequipped to deal with culture clashes.

Let me explain.

See, to begin with, until this very most recent generation of kids whose families have had the resources to send them overseas, almost all Koreans have pretty much spent almost all their lives in Korea, speaking Korean, hanging out with Koreans, and doing things the Korean way. Even when Koreans travel outside of Korea, as anybody who's gone on a group tour knows, Koreans do it The Korean Way, and effectively carve out a little mini-Korea in the middle of the country they're visiting, going to the same Korean guest-house, eating at the only Korean restaurant in town (almost every night on some tours) and sneaking soju and kimchi in their carry-ons, in order not to have to eat any of that weird-smelling non-Korean food (the delicious irony of the country that invented dwenjang and the world's strongest garlic, complaining about the smell of Pho noodle soup, is not lost on me. Pot, meet kettle.) [image] Being surrounded by people doing everything the Korean way, and having no reason to seek out alternative ways to do things (the pressure to conform is also beyond the scope of this essay, but it's sure there) basically, most Koreans have never been asked, nor challenged themselves, to color outside the lines. Why would they? Those lines got there through years of the auspicious ancestors perfecting the system, and it worked for them!

Then, take a white English teacher. Especially a white male English teacher from a primarily-white home country (I don't think I can speak for South-Africans here...maybe one of you would like to explain the phenomenon I'm about to describe as it pertains to your countrypersons in the comments?). Yeah, we Westerners (though I've heard those Oceanians rankle at being called Westerners: sorry my Aussie and Kiwi readers) have generally had a little more experience meeting people from different cultures, and with different skin colors than born-and-raised Korea Koreans, but for the white of us (and I'm not saying that all English teachers are white, nor should be [heaven forbid!] but the Korean preference to hire whites has been fairly well-documented), and especially the white males, we've always been the face of the majority in our country. Sure, there might be a little white-priviledge guilt mixed in there, and we might be very open-minded in our choices of lifestyle, friends, association, and whatever else, but when push comes to shove, the onus lies on the other cultures immigrating to and living in our home countries, to learn OUR language. In our home countries, blending in, for those immigrants and ethnic minorities, means becoming more like us, in speech, dress, behavior, attitude, whatever. I ain't saying it's right, and I ain't saying our countries are as anti-diverse as they might have been in 1955, but for now the fact remains, we're still the face of the hegemony, and are used to things being done the way WE do them.

Whew! All this broad-brush painting is tiring!

[image]

So take Koreans who have had things done their way ALL their lives (and the assumption that things will continue to be done THEIR way is strongest in older Korean males), and English teachers who have had things done THEIR way all their lives (and, not to say it doesn't appear in other genders or colors, but I'm pretty confident in saying that this feature is also most concentrated in white males), put them together in a situation where one has a lot of money at stake, and the other is deep in culture shock, in every part of his/her life, and they have wildly different ways of doing things, and neither have ANY experience in their lives of being the one who accomodates, instead of being the one who is accomodated: we are, on either side, Speck-TACK-yoo-lair-ly unequipped to deal with eachother. At least white females and non-whites have had to deal with white male bullshit all their lives! Expat Jane has valuable things to say about this. Go read. With this in mind, is it any surprise that it has been reported to me, by a few friends whose observations I trust, that first-world white males complain about Korea, and racism, and whatnot, more than any other group of expat? So, again, neither side is off the hook, but we can at least be mindful of where we're coming from, and hope for the same from our counterparts.

This is not a point to be thrown in the face of the person who disagrees with you; this is not just more fodder for certain English-teacher-hating Korea Times trolls: this is simply something to be aware of in ourselves. Somebody with a sprained ankle ought to go slower down the stairs than an athlete, and someone who's never in his life been asked to so radically consider other ways of doing things ought to approach conflicts with a bit more open-mindedness, humility and flexibility than that multicultural whiz-kid diplomat's daughter, who navigates cultural barriers as easy as breathing.

Another thing about this culture clash is that, Korea is not like our western countries, where the diverse population includes a mix of F.O.B.'s (fresh off the boat), semi-experienced, very experienced, and second generation immigrants, and the diverse populations in our countries increase both by immigration AND reproduction. Many of the mixed-ethnic people in our home countries are from immigrant families, many are second-generation kids who grow up culturally hip, smart and capable code-switchers who can blend in smoothly both with their own immigrant communities AND with the majority culture. They can act as a buffer between the shocking otherness of their parents, and the dominant culture. [image] But here in Korea, immigration is rare, so such code-switching kids are only coming from international marriages, many of whom (especially in the case of the international marriages in the countryside between Korean males and Southeast Asian women) are still quite young, and some of the Koreans returning from living overseas (though they have their own troubles re-acclimating to Korea, I'm told) and those mixed kids are still struggling to find their place in Korean society, rather than acting as go-betweens between their less-culturally hip parents and the culture of the majority, as a kind of semi-Other mediating the more concentrated Otherness of their parents, who might never lose their accent, and don't like seeing their kids marry non-theirethnicgroups. I don't dare say much more than that about where returning overseas Koreans fit into this... any of my Kyopo readers want to throw in a thought or two in the comments? (As a non-Kyopo, I haven't, and I'd ask other non-Kyopos not to speak for them). What about Korean adoptees? Jeez, I don't know.

Anyway, what that all means is that for all the ethnic diversity in our home countries, there're also a bunch of visible minorities in North America who are skilled code-switchers, able to blend in and even mediate between the Other and the majority. For us English teachers in Korea, many of us ain't so hot at code-switching. For us, the more common pattern is "F.O.B. arrives, goes through a year or two of spectacularly difficult culture-clashes and personality-clashes that are frustrating on both sides, and just as he/she reaches a point where he/she is starting to "get" Korea, and can start to go with the flow, leaves to be replaced with ANOTHER F.O.B. who goes through the same frustrating travails, and also then leaves, and so forth. That pattern sets us up to be disliked by the people who have to deal with us every day, and deal with the same bull again with each new teacher, like a hamster on a treadmill. Now sure, part of the blame for this is, again, on the gatekeepers: the employers who are not willing to add enough incentives to make it worthwhile for more of us to stay longer and put down roots here, and (seemingly) would rather suffer those clashes, than pay what our experience is actually worth in ease of dealing with us and improved teaching ability, professionalism, and cultural awareness. This, again, is where it's a shame that so many long-termers and high-level Korean speaking expats don't continue to associate with the newer English teachers, because, again, they'd be helpful as a buffer for the shocking otherness of the F.O.B.'s, and better at explaining the score than that OTHER F.O.B. who's only really been there six months longer than the new guy. Plus, unlike second generation immigrant kids, who are buffering for their FAMILY, long-term expats feel less, little, or no obligation toward the new ones.

So, acclimation is hard. Harder than we ever realized it would be. It's part of the package, though, and we've got to find the healthiest way possible to deal with it.

[image: not quite a melting pot, but...]

Next question: what about integration? One of my friends has a brother who lives in Sweden, and he loves it there, and his Swedish is good enough that he can almost fit in without being noticed...but not quite. He says that while he appreciates the special treatment that comes of being an outsider, he'd rather be ignored. That's what integration is. He wants to be just another joe (or Bjorn, as it were), who happens not to speak Swedish as well as most....but well enough, thanks. Rather than pointing a neon sign at the differences between him and the rest of Sweden, he'd rather move around without making any waves.

And here's the next thing about the expat experience. See, I think a lot of us are a bit confused about what exactly we want from our Korea experience (likewise, our bosses often don't know what to do with us). Integration would mean that we are treated EXACTLY the same as the Koreans around us. If it could truly happen, imagine: no kids would shout "FOREIGNER!" and point when we pass a field-trip, no more shouted "MY NAME IS SUJI!" from across the street. No old guys leering, or cursing at us, or no old ladies grabbing our love handles and laughing to her friends. Nobody approaching us in bookstores with "Free English Lesson" written all over their face, or staring at our erogenous zones in saunas. (Yes! Foreigners have them too!) Wouldn't it be nice! But it would also mean being ignored on the bus by those cute kids. It would mean facing the same obstacles and expectations a Korean mate would face in dating, and, even worse, in the workplace. It would mean being expected to learn the language, because "This is Korea" ("Learn English. This is America:" how often have you heard that?) and sure, the cops would treat us the same in a scuffle, but the landlord's wife wouldn't bring us fruit just because we're foreigners, the young people wouldn't afford us those curiousity dates that drop in our laps from time to time, and we'd have to work harder to get phone numbers, and if we were lost downtown, nobody'd approach us and ask if we need help. I don't think we can separate the good from the bad, and ask for only the good parts. It's a little disingenuous to expect it, but it might help us to remember that being called "handsome" or "beautiful" regularly, getting away with stuff by playing the "foreigner card" (gee, sir, sorry: I couldn't read the "park closed after 10pm" sign) getting free bonus-stuff at shops or restaurants, having an easier time getting away with approaching strangers to get a phone number or whatever, comes out of the same perception of uniqueness and otherness that attracts the weird drunk guys to come and talk to US, over all the other people on the subway car. So would we give it ALL up, in order no longer to be singled out in the news, on the street, by the big hairy old-guy eyeball, and such? Maybe I would, but I'd have to think about it for a while. I kind of like the well-meant "can I help you find something?" strangers who approach me at subway stations, or the coworkers who say "I want to take you to a traditional Korean restaurant" or invite us to eat with their families, or to come to their houses on holidays and observe the ancestral rituals. I kind of like being special here. I think a lot of us do, and after glowing from the special attention, it's a bit hypocritical to complain in the next breath about the people staring at us who AREN'T cute young Koreans of the opposite gender.

This is the part of the essay where I mention that every time unqualified English teachers get mentioned in the media, coverage conveniently fails to direct any scrutiny toward the gatekeepers of the ESL industry: the recruiters, the employers, and a little farther removed, Korean immigration. More attention SHOULD be paid to the clowns who are letting these clowns into the country, and the word unqualified really only highlights how badly recruiters hogwan owners and immigration are bunging up their job as gatekeepers... especially when immigration does it, because first they set the bar, and then they moan hypocritically that it's too low, when THEY decided where it should be. One of the best comments I ever read on this topic was also one of the simplest: it was on the Marmot's Hole, and all it said was "1. Many native English teachers. 2. Well-trained, professionally qualified native English teachers. 3. Cheap native English teachers. Korea has to pick two." Can't remember who wrote it, though.

But there's plenty of blame to go around for who gets in. The moms who settle for discount frat boy instead of paying extra for a real educator are also to blame, as are the hogwan regulatory institutions that are either too lazy, too understaffed, or too corrupt to fix a failing system.

[image] Fact is, as long as there's a place for jokers and deadbeats on the demand side, there will always be deadbeats and jokers ready to fill the demand. And then we get into the vicious cycle where those jokers convince people that Native English Teachers are just singing white monkeys anyway, therefore we are assigned tasks and curricula that demand nothing better from us, which ask far less of (most of) us than we are capable, or put us into conditions where actual professionalism is impossible: split-shifts, insane working hours, unreasonable demands, unpaid overtime, and so forth... so we do the bare minimum we can, either because too much is asked, or because we've given up because the curriculum is insultingly simple, or because the boss just wants warm bodies in the classroom and flaunts his lack of care about education, creating a culture of complacency about education, and despite our initial intentions or qualifications, we're doing no better a job than that white, dancing monkey after all. Upon seeing such work, the boss's idea is confirmed that skimping for a cheap native speaker makes more sense than paying the kind of money it would cost to bring in teachers with qualification, and we're going in circles, playing "the chicken or the egg?"

Next thing about the racism dialog: it's happening simultaneously on two levels: on the Macro Level -- that is, the big picture, where English teacher organizations and Anti-Defamation Leagues should be interacting with groups like the Press Arbitration committee and the National Human Rights Commission of Korea, and also on the Micro Level, where we demonstrate good character and professional conduct to our coworkers and the Koreans we meet, and walk away from provocation instead of stirring shit up, wherein our behaviour is so unimpeachable that instead of reading articles by bigots like Choi Hui-Seon and thinking, "Yeah! We really SHOULD do something about English teachers! [image] I wish somebody'd done something about those awful weiguks I saw last weekend...," the Koreans around us read such articles and think, "Wow! This is so clearly racist bullshit: I've known a bunch of English Teachers, and all of them have been polite, global-minded, professional and altogether above reproach!" These two levels of discourse are not always in step: while the civil rights movement had LEGALLY forbidden certain acts, and extended certain other rights and priveledges to African-Americans, racist hate-crimes and various forms of discrimination or profiling did, and still do, continue. Changing laws is a lot easier than changing minds, and changing enough minds to comprise a change in culture takes time. It might be a full generation, or two, before Korea fully recognizes the role foreigners and mixed-blood citizens will play in Korea's future: it was two generations between the Civil Rights movement and Obama's election, and even in American black-white race-relations, there's still work to be done. Until then... work in progress. Sorry about the mess. Please be patient with traffic stoppages.

The Devil's Post

This is post 666 at Roboseyo, and I want to know...

a little while ago, a New Zealand company made an ad that mocked Korea's national assembly for looking more like a rugby scrum than a group of lawmakers, and Kiwi-Koreans protested and got it pulled. Does anybody have a link or video of that commercial?

A Moment to Acknowledge...

After the fuss made about it earlier, and even my Korea Herald Article, it should be noted that the news reports I've seen on the swine flu in Korea are no longer focusing on English Teachers as carriers.

I'm happy about this, and it's important to note when things are done responsibly, especially if we get all shrill when they're done badly.

Monday, August 17, 2009

Two Sports Stories. Usain Bolt 9.58, EJ Yang

Just look at Usain Bolt's 9.58 race.


And EJ Yang, a Korean, becomes the first person to catch Tiger Woods when Tiger's leading a major tournament after 54 holes. Bringing down the deadliest assassin in golf, and the most reliable closer, is pretty darn impressive, too. In fact, I'll have to check the rules on this, but getting smacked around by a Korean in a Major might mean that Tiger now becomes part Korean, and Koreans can henceforward take credit for his future successes. (I might be wrong there, though.)