North Korea on Youtube

The Korea Herald had a blurb on its front page that North Korea had opened a Youtube channel.  Now, this is very, very interesting news to me, because a North Korean propaganda channel on Youtube is/could be...

1. unintentionally hilarious
2. unintentionally frightening
3. a fascinating convergence of backward-looking thought with new media
4. in danger of being blocked by the Korean government
5. loaded with hilariously bad English

-here we expat bloggers have been moaning that South Korean promotions people have been failing to reach their audience because they've been publishing/producing stuff THEY like instead of stuff that'll actually reach their audience... how much do you want to bet a North Korean Youtube channel will raise that hilari-out-of-touchness to a degree we may never have seen before.

If the intended audience of the Youtube channel is the international world, and not just South Korean sympathizers/potential sympathizers, that is.

Here's North Korea's Youtube Channel: take it with a grain of salt, and keep an eye on it: who knows when the hilarity will begin.  I'm praying for subtitles and English language narrators to keep me joy-ing.

Also interesting are the comment threads on most Youtube channels related to North Korea: even my own video about North Korea gets a random "Hail the great North Korea" comment posted on it about every third month or so.

For more North Korea on Youtube:
JucheKorea
rodrigorojo1 (Hat-tip to Reasonable Man)
the famous north/south b-boy showdown video that went around Youtube.

The video you SHOULD watch is this one, by LINK (Liberty In North Korea) - this was a video sponsored by Google to spread word about the situation in North Korea.  This video features a talk by a North Korean defector who grew up in a North Korean concentration camp.  Did you know there are still concentration camps operating in the world?  Why isn't every person in the world outraged about this?

public executions, mass starvation, concentration camps; the list goes on.

The tragedy: this video only has 100 000 or so views as of today.

story on google news
I'd link the Korea Herald article, but I've been getting "this site will harm your computer warnings" lately.

Vice Guide to North Korea: a tour of North Korea from the view of a western TV Crew who pretended to be tourists, and took hidden camera footage.

Language Changes How We Think: Article from "givemesomethingtoread.com"

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748703467304575383131592767868.html?mod=WSJEUROPE_hpp_MIDDLETopNews#printMode

Quote:

All this new research shows us that the languages we speak not only reflect or express our thoughts, but also shape the very thoughts we wish to express. The structures that exist in our languages profoundly shape how we construct reality, and help make us as smart and sophisticated as we are.

Language is a uniquely human gift. When we study language, we are uncovering in part what makes us human, getting a peek at the very nature of human nature. As we uncover how languages and their speakers differ from one another, we discover that human natures too can differ dramatically, depending on the languages we speak. The next steps are to understand the mechanisms through which languages help us construct the incredibly complex knowledge systems we have.

What does that mean for what you know of the Korean language?  Dump your theories here.

Sucks to your Internets, Korean Immigration. or: dealing with HIKOREA.or.kr was extremely frustrating today

I'm fuming right now.  All I wanted to do was make a reservation so that I didn't have to wait for five FRIGGIN' hours at immigration tomorrow afternoon when I actually have free time in my MAD schedule to go down and finish the documentation for my marriage visa.

That doesn't sound too hard, does it?

So I go to the website.  No problem.  Try to log in.  Popup.

"*#&@^$^@%@%^" (translation: "this is Korea, durr. We haven't heard of google chrome, or internet platforms other than Internet Explorer Six") ... or to be more accurate..

this...

is...

korea...

we...

haven't...

heard...

of...

you get the idea.

Firefox? (also known as the world's most widely used web browser)  No dice.  Safari?  No dice.

Welcome to Korea.  Mac users need not apply.  My own dumb fault for getting a mac, I suppose, but cripes almighty!

screenshot:  oh really? you don't say.

So I phone the operator at the immigration phone line thoughtfully supplied by the government of Korea.  How nice.  Really. and the lady was quite polite and patient, as she asked me to tell her my hikorea login and password over the phone (seriously, Korea? this is how you do things? have people read passwords to other people over the phone?)

except that there was NOTHING she could do.  Literally nothing.

The password I got when I registered didn't work.

"So how can I get a new password?"
Well, just go to your fax machine...
"Nobody uses fax machines."

Seriously?  A FRIGGIN' FAX MACHINE is the only way to recover your password?
Youtube lets you click a button, prove you're not a machine, and sends an e-mail to the address you originally provided.  Would that be so hard?

"But if you don't have a fax machine you can't get a new password."
Kind of misses the point of bringing the service online, don't you think?
"Maybe you have a friend who has a hikorea login that can make a reservation for you?"
Umm. no.  Why should I need to?
"Maybe you can come in really early tomorrow when the lines are light?"

Got classes then.

So I'm going to end up sitting in immigration for THREE FRIGGIN' HOURS of my ONLY FRIGGIN' free afternoon of the week (thanks to the new "hey, your seniority means nothing; you're all working four nights a week; newlywed nothin'!  Better enjoy your new bride on the weekend, 'cause you'll be getting home dead-tired ALL WEEK!" policy at my school) because that lovely, thoughtful phone line won't let people make reservations over the phone, even if they can provide all the pertinent id numbers.

Nope. They just have the phone line to talk you in circles until you go back to the website, so that nobody has to actually directly deal with you.

I'll be positive tomorrow.  Right now I'm friggin' choked.

And dear everyone running a website in Korea: it ain't 1997 anymore.  figure out a way to run your website on more than just Internet Explorer six.  Dumbass.

GAAAAH!

(image credit)

ATEK Presidential Nominations

The July ATEK newsletter, which was sent out to all members, announced that presidential nominations began on July 23.  They close tomorrow.

So far, one person has submitted her candidacy, and while I'm assured that she's awesome, it's better for the organization, and better for English teachers, if we have more people in the running.  Campaigning and presidential debates allow for a discussion of English teachers' situation in Korea, and the future of the organization, in a way that more clearly articulates a person's vision, and the community's needs.  If you're a general member of ATEK, and you want to throw your hat in the ring, the nomination period ends tomorrow, so get down to the ATEK general members forum to join the race.  Also: any nominations need to be seconded by a general member.  Don't forget to second candidates you support.

New Korea-related Brilliance on Youtube

When I was looking for that trot video I posted on the Taxi driver post, I stumbled across these as well:

now, I know we're all fond of KPop - honestly, it's taken me five years or so, but K-pop is starting to grow on me. Really grow on me - basically, because within the limitations of what it's trying to accomplish, it succeeds eeeextreeeemmmelllly well.

And let's be honest: we all have a soft spot for trot music, the cheesy, accordion-rich music the old taxi drivers listen to when they drive us from place to place, loaded with overdone vibratos and yodel-ly voice-cracking vocalization techniques.  It's silly, it's fun, and it's unlike ANYTHING from back home... admit it. You like it.  I know you do.

So let's combine them.

Watch the first two minutes of each of these videos if you don't know the original song, and then watch the howlingly funny "Trot" remakes:

Lollipop - from a phone ad a little while ago.  Featuring TWO Kpop megabands: Big Bang AND 2NE1.  That's right. How many kpop teen idol band sensations are promoting YOUR phone?  TWO? I didn't think so.


The Trot version:

bear with me. it gets better.


"Heartbreaker" by G-Dragon


And the trot remake: about halfway through, the traditional instruments take the whole thing moves to a new level approaching the sublime.

As an extra bonus, the Korean title is "Trotbreaker"

Finally, the best of all:

"Sorry Sorry" by SuperJunior, one of KPop's biggest supergroups.


and then watch this, the Trot Remake.

been having an excellent taxi driver week

Sometimes it's the little things in life that keep you afloat... especially when one's glorious wedding/family visit/honeymoon to the maldives/summer vacation suddenly morphs into a "worst working schedule I've ever had and the staff room air conditioner stopped working" return to work.

but i'm happy to report that I've had a startlingly good run of taxi drivers lately.

And as tribute to Taxi Drivers, who can be the best, or the worst thing about life in Korea, depending on the one, and the day, and the weather, here's some taxi driver music, also known as "Trot" or 트로트.


Wifeoseyo and I were in a taxi heading to the Seoul Station Lotte Mart, and as we passed Seoul Station, Wifeoseyo twisted around and gasped, "We've gone past Seoul Station! What are you doing?" to the taxi driver. As we came a little farther around the corner, it was revealed that the Lotte Mart was around the side of the main station. Instead of the gruff, bulldog snarl that a lot of taxi-drivers would offer when their passenger said, in effect, "What the hell are you doing?" -- this taxi driver looked ahead, and sang cheerfully, "Lotte Marteu" exactly the way the radio jingle goes. It cracked us both up, and turned the situation from possible mean to brilliantly fun. Lovely.

then, yesterday, I got off work, and wanted to test out another route home before the car wifeoseyo and I ordered arrives, and I start seriously considering driving to work. So I caught a cab, and asked him to take me home by way of a certain road that's less travelled by than the usual thoroughfares taxi drivers head for, when one asks to go to my new neighborhood.

As soon as I started talking in Korean, the Taxi driver started laughing with glee -- it took me a few seconds to suss out that he wasn't mocking me, but was simply impressed and tickled that I spoke Korean as well as I did (not THAT well... but I'll take it)

Then, he started telling stories in 85% Korean (but mostly simple enough I could catch the gist), about other non-Korean passengers he'd taken, which included a hilarious re-enactment of a conversation with some Arab passengers-

"You tomorrow airport come! Big cash!"
"No I taxi small! Five people my taxi small."
"Please you come tomorrow please cash money!"
"I sorry taxi small no five people sorry!"

he was laughing all through his own story, and the way he told it reminded me of the seven-year-old I used to teach who was so excited about his story that he stopped using words, and just acted the ends of his stories out with broad, comical charades, while his classmates looked on, bemused, with faces reading, "I have no idea what's going on, but it sure is entertaining!"

Then he went on to explain how Japanese passengers can't speak Korean OR English, and complained that English is hard. He took his little screen (which had been playing trot/techno, which he stopped at the beginning of the trip, and which I asked him to turn back on, because it was hella fun), and turned on an English tv drama, which we watched, all as he told me in asides, "I have no idea what they're saying," and then took a phrase from the show "How do you like that?" and repeated it as he heard it: "Hawyuulaee'det?" over and over, until it cracked me up again.

So yeah, sometimes things get busy, and air conditioners break down, and wallets get pick-pocketed... but there's always a funny taxi driver, a cute old lady, or a friendly stranger, to keep things from going too far down the dark road.

Best Mangled English of the Year So Far

Courtesy of Nick Elwood, of the blog "Bathhouse Ballads"

Electric Rice Cooker...

and cum warmer.

If you're into that kinky stuff. (as Nick says: don't forget to wash it out after)

Did this make the rounds while I was on my honeymoon, or is it as hilarious to you as it is to me?

Any other submissions for best mangled English of 2010, so far?

My Niece is Cute

One of the best thing about the wedding was the fact all but one of my nieces and nephews came to Korea to be at the wedding.  It was awesome!  My youngest niece (by one week) was the star of the show for a lot of the trip: her big blue eyes hypnotized the ajummas to give her free stuff, and she is very outgoing -- but just shy enough not to let anyone but her parents or relatives pick her up (fortunately).  Here, you can see her trying out her Korean (she understood what they meant, too), singing a song, kissing her new Aunty Wifeoseyo (we also call her Imo Wifeoseyo...except with her real name) and dancing to K-pop, as well as enjoying herself at the Morning Calm Garden.



One of the best parts was during the musical "Miso" at the Jungdong theater, which I highly, highly recommend: the cast of the musical spotted her sitting in the second row, and during the whole rest of the show they were sneaking peeks at her, waving at her, and the like.  Nieceoseyo, for her part, was an absolute doll: her mom (who directs plays back home) told Nieceoseyo to wave and blow kisses at the cast members, and they were total goners.  It was so fun to watch.  Even without the "the cast was flirting with my niece" part (they also flirted with my other nieces, who are three and eight, the show was great.

Finally, after the show finished, the cast came up to the Jungdong theater courtyard in full costume for some photo ops... but a lot of the people in the audience wanted pictures of my nieces and nephews instead!  :)

ATEK's Next President

*this is Rob's own Blog, not an official ATEK release.*

Now as I said when I announced my position as ATEK communications officer, I don't want ATEK to take over Roboseyo... on the other hand, this here passes the "if I weren't ATEK's communications guy, would I write about this?" test.

As you may have heard at Chris in South Korea, ATEK President Greg Dolezal's one-year term is coming to an end, and we're taking nominations right now for candidates for the next president.

Last year, the debate between Greg Dolezal and Stephannie White during ATEK's presidential campaigns, hosted by Koreabridge.net, led to a great podcast which ended up articulating a lot of the issues affecting English teachers.

Now, a year later, ATEK is standing on much more stable ground than its controversy-ridden beginnings.  The three-man organization and the Equal Checks campaign have given way to a solid organization built for growth, a growing membership, and a growing number of active officers working in their regional organizations to help English teachers with all kinds of different needs.

Some of ATEK's recent successes include launching the Legal Assurance Program with Kangnam Labor Law Firm, building connections with the Seoul Metro Police Association, ratifying a set of new bylaws that set the organization up for big growth in the future, growing connections with groups like Kotesol, and avoiding the standoffish posture that, while it seems like stuff is getting accomplished, ultimately alienates the people we want to be talking with.  ATEK is making inroads to having an actual place at the table in discussions about the future of English education in Korea, and ATEK has more officers and more support now for the next president than we've ever had before: when Greg started, the number of ATEK officers was much smaller, and the organization was recovering from some bad press, and we're looking for nominations for our next president: a few candidates would be ideal: giving members a choice is important, and the campaign is an important chance to articulate ATEK's next steps.

Any general member can run for president... to become an associate member, go to ATEK.or.kr/join, and to become a general member (which you have to be, to run for president), the e-mail you receive for becoming an associate member will have more information.  Then, once you're a general member, go to the general member discussion forums, and post a comment announcing your candidacy.  For more information, e-mail Russell at officers@atek.or.kr, or Greg at president@atek.or.kr

In my opinion, what ATEK needs now is somebody who can build on the foundation we have: ATEK is working really well as a communication network, sharing information and help with teachers who need it, and gathering information from teachers, to communicate them to those who make decisions that affect English teachers' fates.  People who want to know what foreigners think about Korea are starting to contact ATEK, because it's put itself out there, and buddy, we badly need other sources for quotes about about English teachers in Korea.

Who'll do well?  Somebody who's good with people, somebody who looks before he or she leaps, but who is passionate about improving English teachers' situations in Korea.  A peacemaker and a coordinator will be more successful than a disturber: because ATEK is still a young organization, the decisions made now can have long-lasting effects, and a good president will be careful enough to consider long-term effects of decisions, but also has the drive to take opportunities when they come.

Meanwhile, ATEK continues looking for people who care about English education in Korea: we have communications positions involving translation and gathering resources to help English teachers, as well as website design and content management.  We have lots of local districts looking for officers in all kinds of positions: social officers to organize events, emergency needs officers to take care of sudden problems that pop up, ethics officers to act as the organization's accountability voice and consciences, and representatives for hogwan teachers, public school teachers, and others.  There are people who have complained that when ATEK says, "We need people to help out," we don't say "We specifically want people with these skills to do this" --- but that's really because there are spaces for what-ever you like to do, and whatever you're good at.  atek.or.kr/officers.  Like helping people? Like coordinating events?  Like sifting through information to choose the most correct and appropriate course of action?  Got law background? Got counselling background? Got a heartbeat?  Atek can find a place where you can add value to the experiences of English teachers in your area, where you can come away from Korea with a reference letter, a better feeling about your time in Korea, and another bullet-point on your resume.

Paper Wedding Done

The good news is, if you wake up really early, you can get all the paper wedding work done in a morning.  Mrs. Roboseyo and I did exactly that yesterday.  The even better good news was that just in case there WERE lines, Jagiseyo (see what I'm doing here?) had cleared the entire day... and then we totally got the afternoon free.  So we went to Wood & Brick, a great bakery to visit in the evening, when their stocks are almost sold out, but an AMAAAZING bakery to visit in the morning, when the sourdough rye is still warm.  We loaded up on good breadstuffs, and had an easy afternoon that involved Seokchon Lake Park in Jamsil, the best Jajangmyeon I've had in my life, and a movie in Myeongdong.

And the paper wedding is done.  We're officially married, all three ways: in a church, in front of a crowd, and in the district office.

The only drawback was that the Korean district office needed a week to send the official certificate, which means that while I got 80% of the immigration work done to apply for my F-2 (marriage) visa, I'll have to go back there with that documents to get the final stamp on it.

Fortunately for Yobo-seyo, the immigration official was very understanding about her work schedule, and said that if I find her back when I return later, Wifeoseyo doesn't need to be there in person, so long as I have all the documents she needed.

Anyway, we saw "Salt" - the new Angelina Jolie movie, which has made me decide/realize two things.

1. Angelina Jolie is the most convincing female hollywood action hero since Sigourney Weaver in the Alien movies.  Who else is even in the running?  Mila Jovovich for Resident Evil, Uma Thurman for Kill Bill (but have you seen "My Super Ex-Girlfriend"? Just about cancels it all out.)  Michelle Rodruigez, but she's having trouble graduating from "Member of the rag-tag group who saves the day" to "Serious headliner"  Anybody I'm missing?  And don't you dare say the Charlie's Angels' ladies.  Michelle Yeoh kicks ALL their asses sideways till tuesday... that's why I said "Hollywood female action heroes"

2. If you're a major hollywood star, and you throw a bone to Korean audiences, they will reward you with SO much love, and probably an extra half-million ticket receipts.  Hugh Jackman, Angelina Jolie, Nicholas Cage: they visited Seoul, and said some nice things about the country and the food, and now Roboseyette absolutely adores them.  (conversely, if you are mean about Korea, you may face a backlash... sometimes with a long memory.  Oprah.)

Then, the big bummer of the day:

I've always said I love that Korea's a really honest country: I once left my shoulder-bag on the back of a chair in a PC room and the next morning it was still there, un-touched, and un-looted.  On the other hand, maybe the law of averages had to exert itself:

After having a really, really wonderful day, in the taxi on the way home, I realized that my wallet was missing.  And it was full of cash - full - after I'd changed almost a year's worth of coin-change into cash this week.  It might have fallen out of my pocket during the movie (which wasn't that impressive - Manchurian Candidate + more explosions, basically), but I'm pretty conscientious about that stuff; I think it might have been pick-pocketed.  Bummer.

Also gone: my Alien Registration Card, my Korean Driver's License, my Korean bank card, my Canadian bank card, and my Canadian credit card.  Some frequent user stamp cards from some coffee shops.  An old student ID card with a really funny picture which I'd kept in there to crack people up (totally irreplaceable).  My costco card. (NNNNOOOOOOOOO!)

NOT gone:
My birth certificate, which I fortuitously removed from the wallet this afternoon thinking, "It's best not to carry this around everywhere"
My passport
My Canadian driver's license
--which is to day, I didn't lose anything that's worse than inconvenient or annoying to replace, except that student card.  Made the phone calls, froze my credit cards - nobody'd tried to use them, anyway, and now I have to ask them to issue me a new Alien Card at Immigration, I guess.  Came out of it relatively unharmed... though a little humbled, a little more cautious, and large payer of the "stupid tax" this month.

So... here's the choice:

Wifeoseyo
Yobo-seyo
Mrs. Roboseyo
Roboseyette
Jagiseyo

and while The Mrs. has final veto, and I'm giving myself five votes, I'm making a poll: how do you think I should refer to the Mrs. on my blog, now that we're married?