Wednesday, 21 March 2012

A Limerick about Comment Moderation

Maybe this is a little blogger-referential for some of you... but at least it's short. A version of this poem is now my comment policy.

A brave keyboard warrior named Smee
emboldened by anonymity,
with misogyny bile
and a gospel quite vile
posted ravings and rantings freely.

The good blogger knew not what to do
as the racist and sexist words flew
for a while found it sport
to provoke a retort
but then quickly got tired of the spew.

Yet of late this small weblog could boast
twenty, thirty plus comments per post
all because of one dude
whose cartoonishly rude
comments seemed like a piss-take at most.

But the trashy fun starts getting tired
once the blog's entire content is mired
in a back-and-forth row with
a self-righteous blow-
hard whose kneejerk replies seem hard-wired.

So before your own blog gets derailed
see to it the trolls get curtailed
don't let jerks have their mirth:
a good chat is well worth
the due vigilance that it entailed.

If a commenter's words barely link
to the topic on which the post thinks
don't be shocked if the tangent
leads to rudeness more flagrant:
moderate it as quick as a wink.

And if courtesy seems somewhat lacking
let the trolls know they're in for a smacking:
that you keep a short leash
before hitting delete
so the chat in good faith can get cracking.

And if I'm in a generous mood,
on a whim I might answer the rude
get a couple barbs in
for a kick and a grin...
or it might be a ban for the 'tude

'Cause this here is my website, not yours
so I set all the rules and the mores
if there's stuff you don't like
you can take a quick hike
to more troll-friendly sites by the scores.

11 comments:

MadlocoB said...

Forgive me, Robo, but as a huge fan of both "Caddyshack" and limmericks, allow me to quote the good Judge Elihu Smails:
"It's easy to grin
When your ship comes in
And you've got the stock market beat.
But the man worthwhile
Is the man who can smile
When his shorts are too tight in the seat."
"Okay, Pookie. Do the honors."

lobotronic said...

wow, you're good at limerick :O

David said...

Just because you do not like something, whether it is one man's comments or Korean laws, doesn't mean they are bad or wrong.

roboseyo said...

Stay on topic, David. Refer to the comment policy. Discussion of Korean laws goes on posts that discuss Korean laws, and after watching the puddle of dog vomit you've left on Burndog's site over the last few weeks, your leash is about two atoms long here.

roboseyo said...

why thank you.

roboseyo said...

@MadLocoB you left a comment, and I can see it on blogger, but it doesn't show up on the page. How did you enter the comment, so that I can advise readers to leave comments some other way, and I don't get more invisible comments. 


MadLocoB's comment: 

Forgive me, Robo, but as a huge fan of both "Caddyshack" and limmericks, allow me to quote the good Judge Elihu Smails: "It's easy to grin When your ship comes in And you've got the stock market beat. But the man worthwhile Is the man who can smile When his shorts are too tight in the seat." "Okay, Pookie. Do the honors."

Madina Boland said...

Hmm, Robo..
I posted it off my iPhone. and it is perfectly visible on iPhone as a first comment on this threat. However, you're right, when I look at the site off my laptop, I can't see it either. Maybe it's something to do with the site's mobile version?? Anyway, never had that problem before....

roboseyo said...

how very strange... maybe Disqus doesn't work on mobile platforms... 
anybody know of a fix?

MadlocoB said...

Ah, but this might be the source of the problem - I did not log on to Discus on iphone - used good old Google account. Maybe it does not support Google sign-on??

Roboseyo said...

test test

Roboseyo said...

Looks like you could use some lessons on poetic meter. Even doggerel forms have their standards, after all. I could give you a big discount off the going "conversational English" rate, you know. ;-)

"tangent" / "flagrant" is an interesting slant rhyme, though, I gotta admit. In a different kind of poem, I could definitely go for it.