Warning: Do Not Start a Brawl in The Korean Baseball League

This might happen.

ht to Zenkimchi

I Like Big Bibles, and thoughts on Sir Mixalot and Lee Hyori

Just watch it. It's funny as heaven.



Next...
Lee Hyori was in a soju ad that's been playing on loop at subway stations around Seoul for a while now.


Now sure, it's Hyori bringing her special brand of hypnotic, "You. . . will. . . buy.  . . this. . . product" CF queenieness and all. . . but what the heaven is up with the song choice?

Of all the songs to choose for a Hyori ad, why choose a schlock novelty from the early nineties, from a one-hit-wonder Dr. Demento crossover poster-boy -- and then running an ad with THAT song, fifteen years after it came out???

(PS: it creeps me out that there are kids who can rap that entire "baby got back" song, who were not even BORN when it came out...though the video is wildly hilarious)

adding to the weirdness of that song showing up in an ad, sorry, but the song fits Hyori like a baggy sweater.  Ass lovely as it is, I'm still looking for the "big ol'" part.  Unless she forgot the other cheek at home on the day she went in for this photo shoot:
Sorry.  While the word shapely is certainly apt, bootylicious just isn't the one for dear Lee Hyori. She's lovely, in that "dear god what a perfect stomach" sort of way,
and a big part of her appeal is the old "of all the K-pop stars, she actually seems like she's having fun instead of just pacing through her choreographer's routines" kind of charisma. . . but she doesn't have enough junk in the trunk to sell records on her big ol'juicy buh-tawcks (thanks, Forrest Gump) alone.

allow me to illustrate:

Big ass:
(courtesy of Nike; text here)

Happy Sir Mix-a-lot (he and his othabrothas can't deny they got sprung):

(lovely nonetheless, but) NOT big ass:
UNhappy Sir Mix-A-Lot: (his othabrothas and he can't deny: they AIN'T got sprung.)

Though with a little help, she might yet hold her own against J-Lo and the bootylicious gang. . .  Sir Mix-a-Lot and his fellas might like this augmented bitty-bit:

But I shall stick with admiring the assets Hyori pops best:

fun charisma, and a really great tummy.

To the choeum chorom music choosey-people who picked THAT song for their ad:

work harder.

How is the weather? The weather is yech today.

The last three days have seen a swanky haze flop down upon the city of Seoul and not let up.

It's gross, and usually air quality this poor is reserved for the spring, with the yellow dust from China, and Autumn is my favourite season because the skies are clearer then than other times.

But not right now.

Heh heh heh. That's exactly what I thought the first time I saw it. Roboseyo's Untimely Film Reviews, part II

"My Sassy Girl," Jeon Jihyun's breakthrough film role (though really, the Samsung commercial and the Giordano commercial will be the reasons she's remembered), was a huge hit in Korea, and remade into a Hollywood film staring Elisha Cuthbert and something something something.

The Korean movie's Trailer:


The Hollywood Remake's Trailer:

(IMDB page)

The Hollywood version tested so poorly with audiences they cut their losses and sent it straight to video. Article here.

"My Sassy Girl" — a smash hit in its native South Korea in 2001 — went straight to video in the US because men rejected its premise of a male character putting up with a bossy love interest in American test screenings, Lee said Friday.

Here's my summary of the movie:

Guy meets beautiful girl.
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!*
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!**
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!***
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
Jeon Jihyun dances. She's hawt.
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
A limp excuse for her ridiculously self-absorbed behavior is half-heartedly presented.
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!****
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
She treats him horribly, but he dotes on her dutifully, because she's just THAT DARN BEAUTIFUL!
Some sad stuff happens. They can't be together for some stupid reason.
Long after he's given up hope of meeting her again, they meet again, through a coincidence that strains credulity, then bursts it, stomps it, and poops on it.
She finally realizes he's the man for her.
Movie over.

* at this point, I'd stopped buying the film.
** by this point, I had not even a single shred of respect for the male lead anymore, and wanted to punch him and tell him to grow a pair.
*** beauty nothin': by this point it could have been Audrey Hepburn and I'd have kicked her to the curb for constantly treating me like a turd
**** heavens to betsy they're still stretching this garbage out?

I KNEW this movie wouldn't fly in North America. Knew it. No man would watch another man be treated like such a sap for the entire duration of a movie. Meanwhile, many Korean women I've met love this movie, and think it's touching how the guy dotes on the girl, without ever thinking about how completely emasculated he's been -- degraded to a level reserved for discarded cellphone accessories -- and wish a guy would dote on THEM like that. To them, I usually answer, "Do you want a boyfriend, or a puppy?"

And every once in a while, I meet a young lady who seems to have taken this movie as a how-to-guide on how to attract a man. And I lose interest about the way you do when you realize that the chocolate bar you saw on the table is actually cat poop.

(kinda like this)


Doesn't. Work. (unless you want a man you can't respect)

There's another movie that sets an even WORSE pattern for young women's behaviour in Korean society. . . but only one I can think of, and I'm saving my write-up on that one up for a proper, spittle-flying frothing rant-down.  

Sure, there are cultural reasons why Korean women might gain some vicarious pleasure from seeing a woman treating a man like poop for ninety minutes, in a culture that is still recovering from having sexism institutionalized pretty much at every level possible, and if a movie like this is part of the recovery process, fair enough. . . I don't have enough sociological background to explore that in depth, but I can understand the movie's existence, from that perspective.

(update: on the comment board, James Turnbull, who is eminently qualified to expand upon these points, provides some context for what I mean, but ultimately dodge, here.)

However, I still don't have to like it, and whatever the movie represents aside, as a matter of personal taste, I found the movie charmless, and the characters unlikeable (the cardinal sin for me watching movies).  I just didn't want to spend time with these people.

Anyway: here's to North American girls NOT having this crap model of femininity foisted upon them.

(PS: For another rant/review I wrote back when nobody read my blog: Here's what I said about D-War back in January!)

Korean Traditional Baby Washer

This is how we do it in the R.O.K.!  (taken while wandering around my hood)